Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Kung Fu Master
However, after the first six week session was over, she pleaded with us to not “make her do it again.” We obliged, but told her that she was to find another activity. When we received a flyer in the mail advertising upcoming Kung Fu lessons at the compound, Scott jokingly asked Juliet if she wanted to become a Kung Fu Master. She immediately responded affirmatively. So beginning last month, our sweet, dainty, quiet Juliet began her training to become a badass.
Time Flies When You're Having Fun
The year-end is often a time of reflection for many people, and this year is no exception for us. We are shocked by how fast our time here in China has gone and how much our lives and perceptions have changed. When we look back 18 months ago to where we are now as a family, we can’t believe how much we’ve changed:
- The "Three Amigos" (Annie, Scott, and Juliet) have morphed into the "Fab Five" with the additions of Lillie and Shanna
- Mr. Chen and Xue Feng are effectively members of the family … despite the fact that we primarily communicate via “charades”
- We went from eating “American” Chinese food about once every 6 months in the U.S. to eating “real” Chinese food five times a week
- Men peeing on the side of the road aren’t seen by anyone as “out of the ordinary”
- Juliet is reading chapter books
- We’ve learned that Thai food (which none of us had EVER eaten) is fantastic and helps scratch the spicy food itch we have from no tex-mex
- Instead of having “can’t miss” shows every week, we just wait until the day after the season finale, buy the full season for $4 and have a “Grey’s Anatomy” marathon over the course of 28 hours
- As much as the quote “you can take the family out of America, but you can’t take America out of the family” applies to us, we have developed an immense appreciation and respect for the people of this very mysterious and interesting country. Nonetheless, we’ll take a Chili’s Old Timer with Cheese over sautéed cow balls any day of the week.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Songtime with Lillie
1. "Baa Baa black sheep how are you? Yassir yassir 3 bags full. One for my master and one for the little girl that lives down the street." Who knew Yassir Arafat doubled as a shepherd?
2. "On the first day of Christmas true love gave to be, a partridge in a tree. On the Tuesday of Christmas, true love gave to me ... something else."
3. "We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Chistmas, and a Happy New You!" Apparently she's sending a shoutout to those of us looking for a little plastic surgery in 2009.
4. "Old McDonald had a farm, and on that farm he had some whores." We wonder if Mrs. McDonald knows what's going on out in the barn?
Sunday, December 7, 2008
The Sunny Shores of Thailand
This is "Jumbo" - the resident baby elephant at the JW Marriott. Jumbo roamed the premises with his handler giving rides, taking pictures, etc:
After over an hour, a few tears, and multiple women's hands cramping up, here's the final product of Juliet's hair getting braided:
Mom and daughter by the pool:
Juliet and Jumbo giving each other a high-five:
Juliet taking a break from swimming:
Scott and Anne posing for Juliet:
Here's a pic from the elephant trek we went on:
Juliet enjoying some Reduced Fat Cheez-its (she's trying to keep her girlish figure):
One of the more curious aspects to vacationing in an area with a lot of Europeans was the prevalence of the Speedo:
Crime Scene Investigation ... In our house
We called the police and they sent a Crime Scene Investigation team out to do a detailed investigation. After a few hours of thorough investigating and lots of mumbling in Chinese, they determined our house was robbed by a man about 6 feet tall ... so basically the investigation did nothing except narrow down the suspect list to about 100 million people (about 1/3 the population of the United States). Nonetheless, two months later our case "has gone cold" and we're not expecting the return of our computer any time soon.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Early September Happenings
Shanna came to us when she was 10 days old. She was born with spina bifida, but after spending a month in the hospital for surgery in late September, she's doing quite well and has a terrific prognosis. Juliet and Lillie adore her and Scott thoroughly enjoys the fact that whenever he yells out "Her name is Shanna," Lillie responds at the top of her lungs wherever she is in the house "It rhymes with banana."
Here are some pics:

Back to Blogging
Saturday, September 13, 2008
A Bit of a Hairy Problem
Sunday, September 7, 2008
The Daily News
Just like in the U.S. you prepay for a given subscription length - 3, 6, 9, or 12 months. However, not like in the U.S., when your subscription runs out … no more paper. No pre-warning, no friendly note from the delivery man, no pre-emptive phone call … no more paper. This is bad in that it takes at least a week and 3 phone calls to the “sales office,” which apparently only has sales people that speak Chinese (funny, for an English newspaper), before the paper gets delivered again.
However, this can be a good thing because you can actually stop the paper service whenever your subscription runs out. This is certainly better than the U.S. where you can decide you don’t what the paper anymore yet it still gets delivered for the next three years … at which point you receive a bill for $7,000.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
A Taxi Ride with Added Benefits
$3 for a cab ride – what a steal!!! It’s even better when you consider that the cab had no air conditioning so he got a free blow dry whizzing down the highway with the windows down. If this wasn’t enough, the driver was apparently offering his “Tuesday Special” as he threw in a complimentary case of whiplash on the 25 kilometer journey.
Monday, September 1, 2008
What goes up ...
As you can imagine, this can cause some confusion if one is not paying attention when walking on an escalator that he or she uses fairly regularly. In the building next door to Scott’s office, there is a Starbucks located on the second floor. He will occasionally walk to get a cup of coffee in the mornings. Last week, while on the phone, he headed to the escalator on the “right” because that is where the “up” escalator had been the last time he had been there. Little did he know the “switcheroo” had been conducted since his last visit.
Now, as you can imagine in the lobby of an office building next door to the Shanghai Stock Exchange in a city with 25 million people, there is quite a bit of action at 9am. As Scott took two clumsy missteps up the “down” escalator at least 25 people (especially those riding down) wondered shockingly with their co-workers “What’s wrong with this moron? Don’t they know in America that it’s a helluva lot easier to use the stairs that are moving upward? And wow look at that – you ever seen somebody’s face turn redder than the Chinese flag?”
Ahhh … the ups and downs of China!
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
This translation was right on
The other morning Scott was in a small city in China and went downstairs for breakfast. He quickly noticed that it was not a Chinese/Western Buffet Breakfast as is typical, but rather, a Chinese-only setup. He began opening the lids of the various dishes in order to survey his options. He came upon one dish that was titled “Closest to Flesh and Blood.”
This little treasure looked like skewered meat, but Scott couldn’t really understand the title. He started running through the options in his head, “What is close to flesh and blood, but not in fact … flesh … or … blood? Maybe it’s tendons, or ligaments, or cartilage, or bone? It could be knuckles or joints I guess?” Ultimately he decided that it had to just be meat with a funny name. WRONG … after taking a mouthful of the not-so-delicious sustenance he deduced the skewered items were some random, chewy combination of tendons, ligaments, cartilage, bone, knuckles, AND joints. He then made the bold conclusion there has never been a more accurate translation of a Chinese delicacy.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Salutations
One of the more curious discoveries we have come across has been how different people close an e-mail before typing their name. In the U.S., typically we Americans stick to “Thanks”, “Thank You”, “Regards”, or maybe even “Kind Regards.”
However, we’ve noticed the Europeans tend to mix it up a bit. It’s not uncommon to get a “Cheers” or maybe even a “Mit freundlichen Grüßen,” but our personal favorite has to be “I Remain.” We really can’t figure it out though. “Thanks” … we get. “Regards” … it makes sense. “I Remain?” Maybe the writer is just trying to get the point across that he or she is still alive, or is just trying to say “In case you thought I was considering changing my name, I didn’t.”
In any event it’s been another of the interesting curiosities as we become more “worldly.”
We Remain,
The Richardsons
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
This stuff is riveting
“Attention passengers, please pay attention to the time printed on your boarding pass. Even while watching the Olympics on the airport television you must arrive at the gate on time in order to board your plane.”
As fabulous as coed, one-armed, blind-folded badminton is, we really can't see missing our flight for it, but to each his own we suppose.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Nothing Like a 3 Year Old Translator
Our housekeeper has been watching Lillie while Scott is at work. It has worked out well so far despite Xue Feng’s lack of English capability. For the most part Scott can fake enough Chinese to figure out what’s going on and communicate with her. However there are times at which he has no clue. Last week, one morning when he was leaving she told him something that left him clueless. Sensing the blank stare on Scott’s face, Lillie stepped in. “She says I need a bath and that she will do it before you get home tonight.”
Now if she could just bargain for purses in the market ... we'd be all set.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
The next Willard Scott?
Last night about 7pm they were walking over to a friend's house for dinner when the following conversation occurred:
Scott: "It sure looks like rain with the sky really dark and all that thunder."
Lillie: "It's not going to rain today, but it is going to rain tomorrow."
Scott: "It might rain tomorrow, but I really think it will rain while we're eating tonight also."
Lillie: "No!!! - it is going to rain tomorrow ... not today!!!"
About 10pm they were walking home on dry ground:
Scott: "Well it hasn't rained yet but I think it still might rain tonight."
Lillie (vehemently): "It is not going to rain today ... it is going to rain tomorrow!!!"
Fast forward to this afternoon at 4pm. When Scott exited a meeting, he looked out his office window to see it raining so hard he couldn't see more than about 100 yards outside. We're not so sure her sudden acquisition of ESP is ready for Vegas or a career in palm reading, but at least we'll know when to take an umbrella with us.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Where's the Camera?
At that moment, LeBron James led the majority of the USA men's basketball team into CPK. Kobe Bryant, Dwayne Wade, Chris Paul, Carlos Boozer, Chris Bosh, Dwight Howard, Darren Williams and Dominique Wilkins all followed him in to enjoy a nice "American" meal.
We couldn't figure out why they didn't stop down for some local fare as we assume pig's feet, duck tongue, etc would be good protein boosters prior to the Olympiad, but their loss was our gain as we got to dine right next to this year's "Dream Team" and their traveling party (coaches, trainers, etc).
Little did we know that about one year ago to the day that we were swiping sugar packets to take home to put on our Cheerios, that in that very spot Kobe Bryant would thank us for wishing them good luck and we'd get to hear LeBron James look at our kids and say "how are you all doing tonight?"
Friday, July 25, 2008
Summer Camp
Juliet just finished three weeks of daily Chinese Camp. For 6.5 hours everyday she attended a camp with native English and native Chinese speaking kids ranging in age from 6-10. For the first three hours of the day they learned Mandarin (with the teacher only speaking in Chinese). In the afternoon they did Chinese arts and crafts and learned about Chinese culture.
Some may call us cruel parents for taking the f out of fun for her summer, but she loved it. Despite the fact she may not be able to kick a soccer ball, spout the girl scout's pledge, or roast marshmellows by the fire when she moves back to America ... we suspect she'll be the only kid on the block that can write the numbers one through ten in Chinese characters.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Return to Blogging
We have been looking for the right way to break back into blogging and the compound's newsletter came today and we thought this was very appropriate. The following was in a section titled "Area Moral Initiative" (no these are not typos):
"A litter less bickering, a litter more neighbors hello;
A litter less selfish, a litter more mutuel assistance;
A litter less height throuing, a litter more care;
A litter less dispose of pet's poo everythere, a litter more civilization walk;
A litter less illegal structures, a litter more quiet decoration;
A litter less parking barbaric, a litter more humility driving;
A litter less vulgar life, a litter more flowers mood;
A litter less social, a litter more harmonious joy."
Friday, June 20, 2008
A Warm Welcome
However, after a 45 minute delay with the benefit of no air conditioning and more flies buzzing around on an airplane than Scott cares to remember (who knew flies have no problems mating right in front of humans ... you'd think they want some privacy), the flight departed for Shanghai.
After landing and retrieving his bag, Scott phone Mr. Chen who informed him he was stuck in traffic 45 minutes away. So off to the cab line, which was 150 people deep and took 35 minutes to wait in ... outside in 100% humidity.
When Scott arrived home, the first thing he did was embrace his kids and told them how much he missed and loved them, and how good it was to be home. After setting Juliet back on the ground and expecting her to respond to his terms of endearment, she turned to Annie and remarked, "Daddy smells like China!"
Welcome Home, Dad!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Big Milestone
The most exciting part of this little development is that the tooth fairy was able to find us here in Shanghai - rewarding our little darling with 100 RMB ($14) - proving that the tooth fairy did REALLY well during the internet boom as it's a far cry from the $0.50 per tooth we got back in the 80s.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Bite Free Plus Fresh Breath
So tonight Annie sprayed all the doors and air in the office of our house with Listerine. Now Listerine has a very distinct taste and odor and Scott and Annie both were a bit overwhelmed by the intense "fragrance" that was penetrating our nostrils. At that moment Lillie walked into the room and in a very deep voice remarked "mama, this smells GOOOOD!"
Scott quickly remarked, "Honey, flowers smell good ... fresh-baked cookies smell good ... mommy smells good ... our office smells like a donkey vomitted up a barrel of vinegar."
Thursday, June 5, 2008
A Few Roses for a Special Occasion
In honor of our anniversary, Scott wanted to order Annie some flowers. He asked an administrative assistant if she could call and order some flowers (since he knew the english proficiency of the florist was probably not college level). He gave her the following instructions.
I would like red roses delivered
I have been married 9 years
It doesn't matter what the flowers cost
I want the card to say Happy Anniversary in Chinese
So his colleague took the instructions and ordered 99 red roses. There were so many roses that Annie had to put them in a trash can with water because she didn't have a vase big enough.
Here is a pic of the massive order of flowers:
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
A Different Kind of Forgotten Toiletry
One of the most curious learnings from his journeys relates to the toiletries in the hotel bathrooms. For starters, every hotel room (from 1 star to 5 star places) has complimentary toothbrushes, razors, vanity kits, shower caps, etc. It’s not like walking down to the reception desk at the Days Inn in Kalamazoo to score a razor, only to find a surly 19 year old who charges you $37.50 for a razor with a cutting capability inferior to that of a piece of paper.
However, in addition to the complimentary toiletries, there are additional items available for sale – the proverbial “mini-bar for the bathroom” as we’ve written before. A few weeks ago, while staying in a 4 star hotel, Scott noticed a colorful box on the counter. He didn’t pay any attention to it until he was cleaning up to check out. What looked like a small box of office supplies turned out to in fact be a box of condoms – which could be yours for the low price of 20 RMB (about $3).
This discovery, however, paled in comparison to the find from last month. Scott found a package of his and hers underwear for sale in his room. The sensual underpants were part of the “Romantic Journey” collection. Now, how you’re supposed to have a “romantic journey” in a room that reeks of cigarette smoke and has two twin beds is a bit of a head-scratcher, but probably well worth the 40 RMB to take your mind off the shower mold.
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Guests
Paul and his willing bride have been on a quest to try a plethora of exotic foods. Though Paul was devastated to find one restaurant was out of Poached Stewed Yak, we still have been able to give them a "taste of the east."
Here are some pics from Scott, Paul, and Melisa's trip to eat Hot Pot:
Paul's Spicy Hunan pot of assorted mushrooms and fatty mutton. You can see the raw cuisine in the background waiting to be stewed:
Here is the plate of fresh shrimp. When we say "fresh" we mean it. A couple of these poor fellas didn't immediately perish upon being skewed and were still trying to squirm free when they arrived at the table:
Scott trying to "de-head" the shrimp with his chopsticks while the steaming broth wafts through the air:
An excited Paul about to throw down some pig intestine:
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Jackson Fever
As he was riding in the car over the weekend, he noticed Juliet was singing under her breath, "Billie Jean is not my lover, she's just the girl that says that I am one ... but the kid is not my son." And who thinks the music of "today" is corrupting our children?
Going Ons
1. Annie's parents came to visit us in late April/early May. They hit Beijing and Xian in addition to their time with us in Shanghai and deemed the trip a success, despite not making a return visit to the Shanghai Hooters (Christmas Day 2007 will certainly go down in family lore).
2. The earthquake that rocked western China almost two weeks ago did not impact us directly. In Shanghai it could only be felt in high-rise buildings. Scott was traveling so did not have to evacuate with the rest of his co-workers.
3. Annie returned to Dallas a week ago for surgery. She is recovering now and will return home to China in another week. She has been up and around the last few days and is feeling better despite being very sore. Having the primary care giver for the children 6,000 miles away has made life in Shanghai a bit more chaotic than normal, but Scott and the ladies apparently are surviving.
4. One of the other key highlights of note happened today when our replacement 5 gallon bottle of water was delivered to the house by one of the compound security guards. Scott never thought in his wildest dreams he'd come across a 5'4", 95 pound man named "Hunk," but in Shanghai ... anything is possible.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Shanghai or the Addams Family?
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Fashionable…or not so much?
It’s not just ultra-hip, metrosexual, 20-something men who look like they just stepped out of the J Crew catalog – it’s everyone. When you get on an airplane, every aisle has at least two of these bags hanging from the seat in from of them. Mr. Chen (our driver) even has one. We never imagined we’d say this, but the “man purse” is alive and well here in China!
Friday, April 25, 2008
Pronoun Problems
The issue is that Lillie, while having learned English very quickly, still doesn’t have her pronouns down worth a darn. In fact, to her, everyone isn’t “he,” but instead, “she” or “her” – including Scott. Usually, he has no problem with this, but last weekend he did take offense when she said to Annie as he emerged from the bathroom, “Mommy, she go potty like a big girl!”
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Precarious Perch
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Faux-pas
Taking this to heart and deciding to fully embrace the culture, at lunch the next day Scott let out a small belch in the middle of the meal. Three people looked up from their food immediately and then nodded happily at his show of appreciation!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
For Sale ... In the Bathroom?
Paid Consumable:
Male-like Sock
Female-like Sock
Male-like Underpants
Female-like Underpants
Bath Salt
The Bath Salt is understandable – now why you have to pay $3 for it is another story, but nonetheless it made sense to include in the “mini-bar for the bathroom.” However, we wonder how many people actually would be interested in the Socks and Underpants, and what exactly is the definition of “male-like” and “female-like?”
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Things that Make You Go Hmmm?!?! – Travel Edition
He was traveling down a major highway in a central China province that is notorious for crime and corruption. At one point, he looked up and saw what appeared to be a police officer standing on a platform off in the distance. As the car approached the figure, he noticed that it was just a mannequin dressed in a police uniform. There was no sign accompanying this “officer” - just a scowling Caucasian lawman. Who knew “Scarecrows” still served a purpose? Hmmm?!?!
While waiting in a slow line 40 deep to get through security at the airport, Scott noticed that several travelers were taking advantage of a special line to his right. The line was titled “For Staff, VIP, First Class, the Old, the Slow, and the Pregnant.” Hmmm?!?!
On his train trip last week, Scott noticed the presence of a paper sack for one to expel vomit if so desired. He didn’t think anything of it as it is probably fairly common for people to get sick while on the train. However, after closer inspection, he noted the bag was titled “Airsickness Bag.” Hmmm?!?!.
If all of the TV channels in the hotel room are in Chinese then why do you need the list of stations in English? Hmmm?!?!.
Friday, April 11, 2008
Fun on the Train
At first he was fairly impressed – the seats were pretty nice (similar to Coach on an airplane). Little did he know the decibel level “in the back of the bus” would be so brain rattling. He equated it to that of a fraternity party – all that was lacking were a few kegs (though cans of beer are sold by the drink cart man and in the vending machine in the waiting hall).
He witnessed some quirky folks, but none more so than his seatmate on his way to Nanjing. The highlight of the trip was her talking on three different cell phones at one time. He’s pretty sure she wasn’t talking to three different people, but rather just having a conference call with herself to pass the time. The alter ego on the Blackberry must have been the supervisor because she was letting the Nokia owner have a piece of her mind while the Motorola user was taking notes. The conference call ended abruptly however when the Nokia owner’s phone went caput. In order to try to fix the problem, she took the battery out and began to slam the phone down on the tray table as hard as she could. Scott considered offering to stand up and jump on it for her, but was concerned she might actually take him up on his offer.
Monday, April 7, 2008
Procuring Pizza
After disembarking from Papa John’s he passed a group of men working on a building expansion. These men were doing some heavy welding on the new structure. At first he thought it was particularly unsafe that these fellas didn’t have any kind of protective barrier between the sparks and their faces. However, at that very moment he noticed there was also no barricade to prevent sparks from flying off on unsuspecting Americans walking by with an armload of pizza. He adeptly leaped two feet in the air like a fool to avoid the fiery discharge. As he collected his breath and proceeded to the car he glanced to his left and noticed that his escapade had just made 26 people’s 45 minute wait for $10 well worth it.
Observations of Lillie Maud
Lillie Maud (aka Bu Chou) has now lived with us for over five months. Through these very interesting months, it has been incredible to see her change so rapidly. For one, her grasp of the English language is amazing. This was particularly evident when yesterday after Scott “tooted.” She asked “Daddy did you poo-poo or just pass gas?”
She has also taken to western food quite rapidly as well. She still likes Chinese food and eats it regularly, but has discovered the greatness the west brings to food also. Here are a few examples:
- Whenever she sees the sign for Papa John’s, she says “Mei Mei Xi Huan Pisa,” which means “Little Sister likes pizza” (and no, to answer your question, we have no idea why she refers to herself in the third person).
- We have to keep the Pringles, or “crackers” as she calls them, on the high shelf because on multiple occasions we have caught her with one arm fully immersed in the can.
- No living being has enjoyed Reese’s Pieces this much since “E.T. The Extraterrestrial.”
- Chicken doesn’t stand a chance when she’s at the table. Whether it’s nuggets, strips, balls, or on-the-bone, she puts a hurtin’ on fried poultry.
- She is convinced Handi-Snacks are a dietary staple.
- If there was a Rice-a-Roni eating contest she would be the World Champion. If there was ever a person that could sustain themselves on merely the “San Francisco Treat,” it would be her.
Sunday, April 6, 2008
New Employee
At first we were a bit concerned. While Mae was not perfect, (we were, in fact, pondering making a change before her departure) she had been with us for 8 months and knew the routine. She was also learning English very quickly which greatly helped communication. However, after one month of Xue Feng working for us, we have absolutely no more apprehension. This woman is so good that we're severely concerned that she is a retention risk. If she decides to market her skills elsewhere she could get snapped up by any of the following:
- The Gap - She could join their staff as a traveling instructor of the class "Folding 101."
- The Container Store - Organization is her middle name. Every cabinet in the house has gotten a once over - she has created at least 20 additional cubic meters of storage space in the house.
- Billy Bob's Window Cleaning - She has been with us for four weeks and has cleaned the insides and outsides of all the windows ... twice.
- The Army - The Sarge would be quite impressed by the tightness of her bed making - Juliet is convinced she uses glue.
- Victoria's Secret - She organizes Annie's bras by color, hue (cream and bright white are separated, and type (underwire is separated from padded, strapless, etc, etc).
- Dry Clean Supercenter - The woman starches and irons underpants - how cool is that?
Friday, April 4, 2008
Who Needs an Alarm Clock?
Juliet: "You know when mom and I were waiting out here a while ago we heard a cock-a-doodle-doo coming from over there?"
Scott: "Really, there are roosters over there huh?"
Juliet: "Yea, and lots of dogs and cats too."
Scott: "No there's not, I drive by here everyday and I've never seen any animals."
Juliet: "I promise you ... there are lots of them ... see, right there ... a dog."
Sure enough at that moment, a stray dog could be seen darting through trees off in a distance. So when he arrived home, he approached Annie about the critters across the way.
Anne: "Oh yea, there's all kinds of things over there. In fact there used to be at least 5 or 6 roosters because I heard them all the time, but I think someone ate them, thank goodness, because it's been much quieter in the mornings lately ... except of course for the dynamite that goes off once a week at 8am in the construction site nearby."
A Few Curious Questions
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Not Much Business
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
The Big Buddha
Monday, March 31, 2008
Cuisine
We were able to experience the greatness of the Hong Kong food on several occasions … in our own personal way.
1. Within three hours of landing at the Hong Kong airport, we had sniffed out the nearest Outback Steakhouse and were munching on a Bloomin’ Onion.
2. The third night, we found a local Italian joint called “Fat Angelos” – with a name like that, you know it was good.
3. When we caught a glimpse of “Mrs. Fields Cookies” out of the corner of our eyes one afternoon, they immediately welled up with tears.
4. We had never dined at the Bubba Gump Shrimp Company while living on U.S. soil, but gave it a big thumbs up after having dinner there atop Victoria’s Peak.
5. We all just about had heart attacks when we discovered there was a Krispy Kreme doughnut shop at the airport. Getting a dozen donuts through security and home to Shanghai is no small task, but mission accomplished.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Disney Names
Some of our favorites:
Vernon
Ricky
Fanny
Larry
Agnes
Dorothy
Kenny
Yolanda
Vincent
Arthur
Joe and its derivatives also seemed to be very common. We saw multiple instances of:
Joe
Jo
Joey
Joanne
Joseph
Josephine
One poor guy, though, must not have been able to make up his mind because he just went with "Man." We hoped to find "Woman" later in the day, but were unsuccessful.
Maybe it’s just part of the charm at “The Happiest Place on Earth”. It sure does bring a smile to your face when you see a native Hong Kong man in his mid-50s named “Ethan.”
Disneyland - Asia Style
The park and hotel are a little over two years old and much smaller than the Disney parks in the U.S. However, it was perfect for Juliet and provided plenty of opportunity for hobnobbing with the Disney characters:
Monday, March 24, 2008
Success – Sort Of
A minute later, Juliet screamed, “Mom … Dad … Mr. Chen is outside with a Chinese guy” (which narrows it down to about 700 million possible people). Mr. Chen apparently had determined if you can’t bring the key to the keymaker then you should bring the keymaker to the house.
When Scott was finally able to throw on some clothes a few minutes later, he made his way outside. However, due to the rain, he wasn’t able to see exactly what was going on. All he could see was that the hood was up on our van and he could hear a fair amount of scraping and chiseling. We have no earthly idea what was transpiring, but ten minutes later Mr. Chen knocked on the door with the proudest “I did it” grin you can imagine.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Happy Easter
Below are some pics of our "magical" first Easter in China.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Give 'em what they want...
In February, we celebrated Juliet's half-birthday at school...it's a little thing they do for all the summer birthdays. On your special day, you (or rather your mommy) get to cover a bulletin board with pictures and tell your life story to your classmates. We still can't believe we have an almost six year old in our midst!
At the beginning of March, the entire Kindergarten took a field trip to the Shanghai Science and Technology Museum. Can't tell Juliet goes to an international school, huh?
Friday, March 21, 2008
Finding the KEY to success
When Mr. Chen came to pick up Annie later that day, he gave her the keys. Unfortunately they were about 1/8 inch too think to fit in any lock ever created by mankind.
So Thursday morning, Scott informed Mr. Chen the keys were “bu hao” (no good). By the time Mr. Chen picked Annie up in the afternoon he had a new set of keys. Unfortunately, these keys were “bu hao” as well which prompted him to get another set made on his way to pick Scott up from work. We guess at this point he determined there was a potential for operator error (because we’ve never used keys before in our lives) because when he and Scott arrived home, he leaped out of the van to try them himself. A few seconds later, Annie (from inside the house) heard a loud Chinese voice let out a big “bu hao” followed by what we can only guess was a couple of “f bombs” in Mandarin.
Friday morning arrived with Mr. Chen clinging to a refund from Carrefour as he decided to take a stab at another store. Tonight he was like a kid in a candy store as he tried the fourth set of keys - just sure this would be the set that would end his frustrating endeavor. A few seconds later the defeated man sighed a “bu hao” again as he went home for what we can only guess was a very, very stiff drink.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Signs Your Foster Child is Ready for Potty-training...
When you lay the child down to change her dirty diaper, she says in her most reassuring voice, "It’s OK Daddy, it's just yi dian, dian." That translates to "just a little" for all you non-Chinese speakers.
After cleaning up the blowout and prior to taking it outside to the trash (because it was NOT in fact, just yi dian, dian), said child turns to you and ever so politely says, "Thank you Daddy."
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Happy Year of the Rat
We naive Americans thought the 4th of July was the pinnacle of fireworks displays. Little did we know that a few nights of Chinese New Year would put the 4th of July to shame. On the “Chinese New Year’s Eve” the 360 degree horizon was so alight in a plethora of multicolored fireworks displays and “sonic booms” that we didn’t know whether to enjoy the beauty or take cover.
So were these displays “official” gatherings of cities, villages, etc? No, these were completely private showings shot off from driveways, apartment balconies and living room windows. Fireworks were all over the place and “everything” was available. I don’t think any of the 1.2 billion people in China missed the opportunity to light a six feet strand of “Black Cats.” It was pretty surprising the day we went out to the store and saw a fireworks stand that provided the opportunity to buy a $75 crate of fireworks the Super Bowl organizers would be envious of.
Here’s a picture of Scott holding the “sparklers” they sell here in China – looks safe for the kids doesn’t it? Scott wanted to roast marshmallows with these things, but Annie thought better of it due to safety concerns (that, and marshmallows cost about $15 of bag).
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Sleepless Mornings
1. “I could call the office. Oh wait they’re still at home sleeping just like all the other sane people around here.”
2. “I could go scream obscenities at the man. However, I am not the one wielding a sledge hammer.”
3. “I could pretend to be a building inspector and tell him he’s violating code. However I left my building inspector costume back home in Dallas.”
Defeated, Scott decided he had no other option but to make a pot of coffee and wait until later when he could call the office and petition to get sledge hammering lumped into the same noise category as lawn mowing.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Bu Chou Update
She's learning English very quickly and as we type this is singing her version of "Jesus Loves Me" at the top of her lungs:
"Jesus lub me the bible. Yea Jesus lub me por the bible tells me son. Little ones me the bible, the is weak and he is strong."
Blogging
Dear Friends and Family,
We sincerely apologize for the unexplainable absence from blogging. We really don’t have a good excuse for not writing other than we have been very busy at home and work, but given that we live by the motto “sleep is rest for the lazy” we probably can’t get away with the busy excuse.
We tried to come up with a good reason, and tossed around the following ideas:
1. “We have spent the past two months trying to keep the kids healthy through cold and flu season.” Since Scott and both girls all sound like they have emphysema we decided that wouldn’t fly.
2. “Scott ate some poisoned Duck Tongue while on a business trip, and lost feeling in his fingertips so has been unable to type.” If this had really happened, he could have dictated to Annie despite the inoperability of his digits, so we once again opted for something else.
3. “Annie was knocked into a coma by falling Styrofoam during her daily jog.” The falling Styrofoam is very believable but Annie jogging? Not so much.
4. “We had dinner at the new Applebee’s in town and all got the runs.” While this did happen, we didn’t think ya’ll would believe that four people could have diarrhea for that long.
So all we can really say is we’re sorry and we promise to keep you abreast of our “going-ons” on a more regular basis from now on.
Love,
The Richardsons
Monday, February 4, 2008
Questions from a Children’s Hospital in China
After spending another two weeks in the children’s hospital with Bu Chou, we have compiled a list of perplexing questions we’ve raised to each other.
- Are we the only people in the hospital that realize the little jingle that plays at the nurse’s station when someone presses the call button is “Oh Susanna?” It’s a good thing they don’t have the words playing along with it … we’d be bombarded by the nurses asking for clarity … “what’s an Alabama and why does some fella have a banjo stuck to his knee?”
- Does the whole hospital know Scott has no clue how to read a rectal thermometer? When Bu Chou was in the hospital in December (she was in a different wing than she is now), the nurses always had to read it for him. On Sunday, the nurse from our current wing (who had seen him for the first time on Saturday) came in to check her temp. She took one look at Scott and left. Five minutes later she returned with an digital thermometer for the ear.
- Why was “Hee Haw” ever popular?
- When people walk down the hallways at Children’s Medical Center of Dallas (or any other children’s hospital in the world) do they see some mother’s panties hanging from a door frame to dry?
- How much money could we make if we charged admission to our room? We are like animals at the zoo as everyone in the hospital comes for a viewing. It’s exactly like when Americans go to zoo and try to speak “Lion” – you hear every Tom, Dick, and Harry try to say the only “Lion” word they know …“Roar”. It’s just the same for us. People come, look at us curiously and then say the only English word they know … “Hello.”
- Why can’t Americans pass gas as openly as Chinese? It is really a glorious thing to be able to let one rip without anyone flinching.
Bu Chou Update
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Frigid
We don't know why it's so freakin' cold here because the temperature says it's around 30 degrees fahrenheit, which is cold, but not Icelandic. People say it's the humidity. It might be - who knows, but this is the coldest 30 degrees we have ever felt.
It certainly has us yearning for July when it's 95 degrees with 100% humidity and we all have 100+ mosquito bites.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
A Big Fat Liar
"Well I hear it's similar to Houston - really hot and humid in the summer. People say the winters are pretty cold but they NEVER have snow in Shanghai."
Below is the picture taken of our neighbors front yard this afternoon. Needless to say, even the "Good for Man" won't do him any good tonight.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Airports
First, the airport is gigantic – there is no doubt one could see it from space.
Second, the runway is forever and a day from the terminal. Imagine taxiing from Dallas to Houston or Kansas City to St. Louis.
Third, the dining choices are a bit limited. If you’re not interested in the government run noodle diner (where even the waiters smoke) then you’re pretty much S.O.L.
Fourth, the bathrooms are in the basement, with no elevator access, and the stairs are at an angle so steep the guy who climbed Mount Everest wouldn’t even attempt it. Thus, if you have some form of disability or are old, you have two choices … hold it or wet yourself.
Fifth, if you have never been burly enough to participate in American Gladiators or Professional Wrestling, then it’s best if you just wait until everyone else has retrieved their luggage before approaching the bag belt. Never before has Scott wanted to “go postal” until he was upended by a spry 95 year old Chinese woman trying to get to her box of luggage large enough to contain a dead body.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Moral Dilemma
Chocolate
Twinkle
Dolly
All seem to be very nice women, so we can’t decide if we should go on about our business or give them the memo that they chose “Stripper Names” to identify themselves.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
An Answer to an Old Question
One old-school commercial that keeps popping up in our heads ever since our move to China is the Dial spot that asked “Aren’t you glad you use Dial … don’t you wish everyone did?”
After riding in elevators, seeing the buses, walking down the street, etc., we have an answer to that question:
“Hell Yes … Hell Yes!”
Bu Chou - Update
Monday, January 21, 2008
Bu Chou - Surgery
Saturday, January 5, 2008
New Year’s Treat or Lost in Translation?
This week he and several co-workers went down there for lunch to catch-up after the holidays. They had a great meal and when the waiter brought their change, he also brought a desk-top calendar for each of the patrons.
Scott didn’t pay much attention to the calendar until today when he was clearing off his desk before heading home for the weekend. He opened the calendar and thumbed through it – each month had a picture of a dish offered at the restaurant with the name in both Chinese and English. Scott turned the calendar to January and thought it an interesting choice to ring in the New Year – “Fried River Shrimps Balls.”
Now for those of you who don’t know, River Shrimp is a common dish in China, but Scott is not so sure he really wants to sample the balls of said shrimp.
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
A Good Visit
At the end of the visit (which concluded today on Jan 1), they had developed some significant learning's about our life in China:
- Mr. Chen (our driver) and Mae (our housekeeper) rank right up there with Morgan Freeman in "Driving Miss Daisy" and Fraulein Maria.
- No fireworks laws means that every Tom, Dick, and Hong can have a glorious show in his or her backyard or apartment roof. This makes New Year's Eve is REALLY cool - even without the presence of Dick Clark and Ryan Seacrest.
- Traffic laws are merely suggestions (unless there is a police car within plain view).
- 15 people really can fit in a 4' by 4' elevator.
- Brett Favre jerseys can be purchased a LONG way from Green Bay, WI from someone who is convinced that football is played by kicking a black and white round ball.
- $10 boxes of cereal do not come with bars of gold as the prize inside. Despite the extraordinary price, they come with alien decoder rings just like in America.
- One bicycle can hold not only a person, but also a water dispenser, a full size refrigerator, and a washing machine.
A Christmas to Remember
Annie's parents, H.D. and Jill Reed, were here in Shanghai to celebrate Christmas with us - Chinese style. With Bu Chou in the hospital until Dec. 27th, our plans just kind of evolved all week. With the help of our housekeeper (who could sit with her at the hospital during the afternoons) we were able to spend some quality time with the Reeds. On Christmas we we had a nice morning here at the house before heading out that afternoon for Christmas dinner.
We had several thoughts on what to do for a perfect Christmas meal. We thought about doing a turkey at home. We also thought about having a large Chinese meal at a restaurant. In the end, however, we decided the best place for a memorable holiday meal was the Shanghai Hooters. We didn't exactly know what to expect, but were definitely not disappointed.
Upon walking into the restaurant we were greeted by 15 Hooters girls shouting at the top of their lungs in unison "Merry Christmas and welcome to Hooters." We were also surprised to see a very large Christmas tree in the foyer (as an FYI, we now know what Charlie Brown's Christmas tree would have looked like if it had been 20 feet tall). About halfway through our meal, 7 waitresses crowded around our table and one of them made an announcement:
"Attention Hooters! We want to extend a special greeting to this lovely family that decided to have their Christmas meal with us here at Hooters. Please give them your applause." The 7 nice ladies then proceeded to serenade us with a version of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" that none of us will EVER forget.
After this one hour of fun, we all (especially H.D. and Scott) certainly had that "springtime feelin' in the middle of December!"