Update 2

Unfortunately Bu Chou's infection did not get better - in fact, the doctor felt like it was getting worse and thus removed her shunt on Wednesday. They are now trying to get rid of the infection and will decide after that what steps to take next. Thank you to everyone for your thoughts and prayers. We'll hopefully have some good news soon!

Update

We found out last week that Bu Chou will be in the hospital for at least another two weeks. The infection she has is very serious and if it doesn't go away soon, they will have to remove the shunt. Her mood is good though and she has been walking around and playing a little more. She's no longer vomiting and is eating like a horse again. However, she still runs a fever on a daily basis.

Hopefully she will continue to improve and the infection will dissipate over the course of the next couple of weeks - we're hoping to get her back to our house for Christmas, but if Santa has to come to the hospital, then so be it!

Annie is holding down the fort at home and at the hospital as Scott had to travel to the U.S. on business - she is now demanding that Santa bring a REALLY nice gift to her this holiday season. Jill (Annie's mother) arrives on Thursday, so she too will soon get to experience the greatness of a Chinese children's hospital.

But at least now Bu Chou and Annie have a private room (of which, we think only a handful exist in the hospital.) We tend to think our roommates were getting a bit sick and tired of us always having to translate for us, as they were much better at charades than the nurses.

Back in the Hospital

Well, we're back in the children's hospital. Not for Juliet this time, but rather Bu Chou. She has developed an infection in the shunt in her head and therefore, has been running a high fever periodically now for almost a week. They admitted her on Tuesday and started her on high doses of IV antibiotics. Hopefully, the fever will break soon and she can get back home, but until then, Annie is spending her days and nights sharing a room with three other sick children and their families - none of whom speak English.

Like a Rock Star

One of the more common things Juliet has to deal with is being oggled everywhere she goes. This was quite prevalent in Beijing where there are a number of Chinese tourists that are not accostomed to seeing Westerners. Juliet made at least 20 people's day by posing for photographs. She posed with men, with women, with old people, with children - she even posed with a lady that had pink highlights in her hair. Here is a picture with a student who was traveling with three other young men. All four had their photos taken with Juliet.




Even Scott was asked by a lady to pose with her in front of Chairman Mao's picture at the entrance of the Forbidden City.

Bu Chou, however, did not get to enjoy such a rock star's welcome in Beijing. After getting sight of us pushing her in the stroller, scores of people would come sprinting towards us to get a glimpse of what our baby in the pink coat might look like. All of them were stunned when, instead of seeing a blond, blue eyed curly headed American, they were greeted fiercely with Bu Chou's darting brown eyes, which stared crossly back at them as if to say:

"What are you looking at? Yes, I'm with them. You would be to if you had someone that bought you as many fake Polo outfits as you wanted and hands you a package of Raisinets every time you wimper."

Turkey Day Weekend

No turkey?
No pie?
No football?
Thanksgiving dinner on Friday at Outback Steakhouse?
A lousy holiday you might ask?

Quite the contrary – we boarded the overnight train last Thursday night for Beijing and had a fantastic holiday weekend. We spent the weekend seeing the historical sites in China’s capital – including Tiananmen Square, The Forbidden City, The Hutongs, and The Great Wall.

Here are some pics from our day at The Great Wall:

CHA-CHING!

FYI - Scott will be having "Good For Man" again for lunch today.

Good For Man

During a business lunch today, Scott was presented with something that looked like thick green hair that had been soaked in something. After conferring with his travel companion, he was told that “they don’t know what it is, but it is “Good For Man.”” Now when someone says “Good For Man” it means two things. One, it will taste like doo doo and two, it apparently will help you “keep the Mrs. happy” when you get home that night.

Scott’s experience with the Green Hair certainly tasted like doo doo. We’ll let you know tomorrow if the second quality came to fruition.

A Different Scale

At times it’s really unimaginable how many people live here in China. For example, this week Scott traveled to the northwest city of Yulin (basically almost to Inner Mongolia). The “metropolitan area” of Yulin has approximately 3.6 million people – which is considerably larger than Dallas-Fort Worth. He had to fly to another city from Shanghai and connect to a 32 seat regional jet because that is the only way to get there. Upon arriving, he walked off the plane (which just stopped at the end of the runway) and observed the following:

• The runway resembled a really large church parking lot
• There was no building to go into - just a rusty gate to walk through about 20 yards from the plane
• They did have Baggage Claim. It consisted of a guy in an Isuzu pickup pulling up and everyone just grabbing his/her luggage.
  

After this experience, coupled with other travels, Scott has created a new categorization for places in China:

“Collection” of more 15 million people = Big City
“Collection” of more than 10 but less than 15 million = City
“Collection” of more than 5 but less than 10 million = Town
“Collection” of more than 1 but less than 5 million = Small Village
“Collection” of less than 1 million people = Farming Community or Fishing Neighborhood

Tying the Knot

The other day, Scott, Annie, and Juliet were able to attend a wedding. It was really a great opportunity to get immersed in the local culture.

The wedding itself wasn’t too different than a Western ceremony – with the exception that there was no “officiant.” Instead there was really what is best described as an emcee that walked us through the proceedings – including offering his commentary during the one of the solos – which was a very good rendition of Josh Groban’s “You Raise Me Up.”

One of the more embarrassing moments for us was during the second solo – which was another great vocal performance – this time of “Amazing Grace.” About two stanzas in, all of sudden Annie and Scott looked at each other because the accompanying vocals in a low voice were coming from our 5 year-old. The giggles were difficult to contain as we tried to shush her, but the song is in her soul and she just insisted on humming along. As people began to do a “half-turn” in our direction we tried to obtain forgiveness by claiming she was a long lost cousin of the bride, but for some reason no one was buying it.

The reception was the typical Chinese meal with the lazy-susan rolling around with a good assortment of local cuisine. Juliet, who was not in adventurous mood, tried two things. After having to spit out “Cheesy Lobster” and “Some Kind of Salad” into Scott’s napkin, we decided she should just stick to Sprite.

The highlight of the evening occurred when they asked the guests to complete a small card offering well wishes to the bride and groom. Little did we know (because our Mandarin is not that good yet) that by completing one of these, we were giving ourselves an opportunity for fabulous prizes in the night’s “Lucky Draw” giveaway. Scott was really kicking himself that he had failed to complete the card after seeing one guest take home a toaster oven and another take home a blender.

Experiencing the Greatness of a Developing Nation

A fusion of "East" and "West" is certainly occurring in China right now. We are lucky enough to witness firsthand a country being introduced to new things, but at the same time maintaining its history and culture.

This point was really driven home today when Scott was walking through McDonalds and saw a man using two straws as chopsticks to pick up a French Fry.

Dilemma

One of the more common uncomfortable situations we often encounter here in China is the mid-conversation belch from the person we’re speaking to. It’s often not loud and obnoxious, but rather soft and light – just enough to throw your whole train of thought off kilter. What do you do? Do you laugh? Do you cry? Do you try to out-burp your friend?

We just can’t stand by and be flabbergasted any longer. Thus, we’ve decided to respond the next time this happens – here are thoughts on how to react to this curious problem:

• "Whoa … that sounded like it came from down deep”
• “Good one – not too deep, not too rumbly … but at the same time, not too pitchy.”
• “My goodness, friend, your eyes are starting to water”
• “Smells like you had fish for lunch … need a mint?”

Universal Appeal

It has been quite interesting to see an almost three year old from China learn about new things from a “Western” family. Amazingly enough, some things are universal in appeal – whether the girl is from Dallas, TX or from Central China:

Purses and Sunglasses – We thought Juliet was alone in her addiction to accessories, but Bu Chou is right there with her. Considering no one needs sunglasses here given the smog cloud that hovers over the city, she gets some very curious looks when out on the town.

Papa John’s Pizza – It might be the abundance of pizza sauce on every slice. It might be the tasty toppings. It might be the mouth watering garlic butter sauce that comes on the side. Whatever it is, it’s a family favorite in the West and the East.

Toy Cell Phones – Whether you call it a Cell Phone or a Shou Ji (pronounced Show G), it is so much fun to fill the house or the car with an incessant beep sound.

Barbie – Despite her very public breakup with Ken, Barbie continues to have worldwide appeal. Coupled with new friends like “Kimono” and “Mika”, Barbie is back and better than ever.

Settling In

We apologize for the lack of blogging recently, but Scott’s been busy at work and we’ve been trying to get Bu Chou (our new foster child) settled in at home. Bu Chou arrived last Friday so she’s been with us for over a week now and is getting comfortable in her new surroundings.

She seems to be feeling pretty well after having brain surgery 2.5 weeks ago and doesn’t appear to be in pain. In fact, she spends most of the day smiling, singing, and repeating EVERYTHING Annie says. She answers questions when asked in Chinese, but when someone speaks English she just mimics the conversation.

Annie: “Bu Chou do you need to go potty?”
Bu Chou: (not having a clue what she’s saying): “Bu Chou you need go potty?”

Annie: “Say Hello.”
Bu Chou: : “Say Hello.”

Here are a few pictures:

Bu Chou on her first day home:

Bu Chou and Juliet:

This one was actually taken by Juliet (pretty good we thought for a 5 year old):

Bu Chou with a mouth full of goldfish...her favorite:

Bu Chou eating Cheerios...another fav:

Bu Chou with her Purse (which never leaves her arm):

Don't you know anyone?

In the U.S., when you’re away from home, it is not uncommon when you meet someone new for them to ask “Where are you from?” It also not uncommon after your response for them to say “I know a guy who lives in Dallas, do you know Mike Brown?” Instead of responding how you really want to, “Of course not, you imbecile, there are 2.5 million people in the Dallas area and probably 300 Mike Browns.” Instead you politely respond one of several ways: “No, the name doesn’t ring a bell” or “You know, the name does sound familiar.”

Here in China, surprisingly enough, we often have similar conversations with people with just a little twist:

Local Person: “Where are you from, U.S., England, …Australia?”
Richardson Family Member: “We’re American”
Local Person (deadly serious): “Ohhhhh … so you know Yao Ming!?!?!”

Now, granted, we’re sure a 7 foot 6 inch Chinese man does probably stick out a tad, and we’re sure he has a lot of friends, but it’s not like America is the size of Dodge City, Kansas.

What a Difference a Year Makes

We were reminiscing the other day about how quickly things change in a year. For example, one year ago on Halloween:

• Our limited knowledge of China was largely a result of the movie “Mulan.”
• We thought authentic Chinese food included Crab Rangoon and Sesame Chicken.
• We had 5,000 frequent flier miles combined amongst the three of us – now we’re all at least Gold.
• We were convinced the maximum occupancy of a moped or bicycle was one.
• If someone had said “Ni Hao” (which means hello and is pronounced like Knee How), we would have been sure someone was asking about our legs.
• The idea of the garbage man riding a bicycle was absurd.
• If someone’s name began with an X we would have had some pronunciation difficulties.
• We would have thought it was odd to see a 40 year old man walking down the street with a pink Hello Kitty umbrella.
• Annie had no clue that someday she would be driven to learn a foreign language solely for the purpose of knowing what people are saying about her in the elevator.

Sun Up and Sun Down

With daylight savings coming to an end next weekend in the U.S. we thought it was a good time to touch on one of the biggest adjustments we’ve had to make moving here to China - sunrise and sunset times. The sun comes up before 5am and sets before 5pm right now. In the dead of summer, it was light until about 5:30pm at the latest point.

There are really two reasons for the early rise and early set of the sun. One, China doesn’t practice daylight savings. Two, China is roughly the same size as the U.S., but the entire country is in the SAME time-zone. Just imagine if New York and Los Angeles had the same exact time – it would be great on New Year’s because everyone would get to celebrate live with Dick Clark and Ryan Seacrest, but not-so-great the rest of year.

If we had migrated here from Alaska or had a paper route then it might not be such a downer, but when we’re used to our summers having sunshine until 9pm, it’s a bit of a beat-down.

Yard Work

One of Scott’s favorite aspects of living in China (and being a “renter”) is the fact we have a gardener that takes care of the lawn. Despite his extreme disdain (and his complete ineptitude) for yardwork, he has never before outsourced the function (primarily due to cash flow constraints).

Our gardener comes three times a week and does the mowing, the watering, the planting, etc. The yard looks good now, but at one point this summer, after weeks and weeks of us complaining the lawn needed to be mowed, all the grass died. It is our theory that he mowed it and then euthanized it so he wouldn’t have to mow it again during the heat of summer (Scott has actually taken note of this in case Annie balks at the hiring of a yard man when we are again homeowners).

It could be worse - at least our gardener does have a mower. Often you will see gardeners butchering an otherwise beautifully manicured 2000 square foot lawn with a weedwacker while a pal comes behind and rakes up the clippings. This method can take an especially dangerous turn when the “wacker” accidentally takes a large divot from the earth and the debris punctures the “rakers” bare legs.

A Temporary Addition

On Wednesday, Anne received an e-mail from a group she volunteers with here in Shanghai. The e-mail stated that a 3 year-old orphan from somewhere outside the city had been rushed here for brain surgery. The child had a brain cyst that caused hydrocephalus and they had to insert a shunt. The group was seeking a foster family for the girl because she will have two months of follow-up care here with the surgeon.

Anne immediately responded to the e-mail and said we were more than willing to foster her during her recovery. A few hours later we were told to come to the hospital the next day to see the girl and sign a form. And… just… like… that…. we became foster parents.

So beginning late this week, she will come to live with us for a couple of months. We are all very excited (especially Juliet) and look forward to sharing our lives with her so she can recover and go back on the adoption list.

The few people we’ve talked to back home about this already have all asked us the two same questions, so we’ll answer both here in advance.

1. No, we would not be able to adopt her. When you are an ex-pat in China you must live here for at least one year until you are eligible to even submit an application to adopt.

2. No, except for “bye-bye” she speaks no English. However, we’re really not that worried about it because our Mandarin is getting much better as a family - Scott and Juliet know quite a few sayings and words and Anne knows how to say “hello” and “do you take plastic?”

New Name for Anne

We recently applied for local Chinese credit cards because there are a number of places in China that do not accept foreign credit cards. According to the application (which was in Chinese so it had to be translated) we had to apply using our full names.

Today we received the cards in the mail and were fairly satisfied to see they had gotten Scott’s name pretty close to being correct. However, they made a slight error on Anne’s card. It came to us with her name written as “An Na”. Nothing else – just “An Na”. Now if her name was actually Anna, then we might see how they could make such a mistake. However, since it isn’t, we are really struggling to see how a major bank could get “An Na.” Plus, if you use the same logic they applied to Scott’s card (surname first then given names), her name would actually be Na An to a westerner.

Sounds like she’s found her Chinese name!

Service with a Little Something Extra

Buying clothes that fit us can be quite challenging here in China. One, the clothes aren’t as big as those in Western countries because Westerners are typically taller (not Scott) and portlier (Scott). Two, the sizes are based on meters rather than inches so we have no clue whatsoever what we need to buy.

Store clerks often really struggle when Westerners walk in, and on several occasions, the clerk has just looked at us and emphatically said NO! However, Annie has a friend who actually got a little “special treatment” when she went to buy a bra. The lady perused her choices and picked out the one she thought “looked right.” The store clerk then approached her and without saying a word, looked at the chosen item and then directly at her chest. After surveying the landscape for about 15 seconds, the clerk cupped her hands and proceeded to “honk her horns.” The clerk immediately selected a different bra and the woman went on her way … A satisfied customer.

Not Your Average School Bus

For the first two plus months of school, Mr. Chen has taken Juliet in our car. However, due to the fact it was taking Scott a lot longer to get to work and because Juliet insisted, she began riding the bus to school this week. Below is a picture of the bus that transports her everyday. Are they going to school or cross-country to Beijing?

Cleanliness is Next to Godliness – Or so We Thought

Today Annie was waiting at the grocery store for the deli to finish slicing her ham and noticed that in one of the pre-packaged sandwiches in the refrigerator case there was a bug crawling around. At first she thought the bug was just on top of the plastic wrap, but upon further inspection realized he or she was actually trapped inside the wrapping along with the sandwich.

When the worker returned with her ham, she felt like she would do her civic duty for the poor soul that might purchase the sandwich and informed the worker about said bug. He came over, took a gander, and thanked her for her assistance. Wondering if any action would be taken, Annie loitered around the deli counter and observed the man tell another worker about the critter.

The other worker immediately sprang into action. She went over and picked up the sandwich. However, instead of disposing of it as Annie expected, she opened the plastic wrap, smashed the insect with her thumb and index finger, and wrapped up the sandwich good as new. Mmmmmm Good!

Plenty of Carbs

It is our recollection from childhood the hot lunch at school typically included a fairly well-rounded, balanced meal. It wasn’t too heavy in one food group versus another (protein, starch, etc). Well, the last few weeks Juliet has begun to eat hot lunch a few times a week. Each night this week, Scott has asked Juliet what she had for lunch.

Monday:
“We had Grilled Sausage … and Rice”

Tuesday:
“We had Meatloaf, Mashed Potatoes … oh yea … and Rice”

Wednesday:
“We had Cheese Pizza … and Rice”

Sensing a trend, the following conversation occurred this evening:

Scott: “So do you have rice everyday?”

Juliet responded with a touch of sass: “Uh yea … Last week we even had Rice with Spaghetti, but I usually only eat a few bites because … you know … It doesn’t taste very good.”

Scott: “Is it Fried Rice or Steamed Rice?”

Juliet: “You get what you get and you don’t throw a fit!”

And that was that.

Too Close for Comfort

This morning Scott witnessed something he felt was truly remarkable. The elevators in his office building are probably about 6’ by 8’ – basically standard size elevators. In the U.S., the maximum number of people that would ever consider getting on said elevator is probably about 8 people max – even without the weight restriction.

Today on his way up to the office on the 24th floor, 21 people got on the elevator – prompting the phrase “Aren’t you glad you use Dial…. Don’t you wish everyone did” to play over and over in his head.

After the 17th person got on, the elevator started buzzing as if to say “good morning elevator travelers but at least one of you is going to need to wait 15 seconds until the next elevator makes it to the ground floor.” Despite the buzzing 4 more people wedged their way onto the sardine-like lift. The buzzing continued but finally dissipated as the doors closed to all 21 people staring across at the other elevator that had landed and was about to head up for its journey with only 3 passengers.

Protection from the Elements

Last night and today, the second typhoon of the summer came through near Shanghai. It brought with it 30 MPH wind and hard rain for virtually 24 hours now. We are trying to stay dry and have been pretty successful, but it’s not so easy for the millions (not an exaggeration) of bicycle and scooter riders here in Shanghai.

There are a variety of interesting methods these folks employ to stay dry. No matter which method selected, each strategy employs an oversized plastic poncho, a ballcap, and two clothes pins. The hat is placed under the poncho to provide a “brim” for the water to roll off, and the clothes pins are used to secure the front of the poncho to one’s handlebars – providing a “tent” to protect the legs and feet from water. Here are a few of the more common strategies:

“The Rollback” – This strategy involves tying plastic Wal-Mart sacks securely around each foot and each hand. The downside is this method requires another person to adequately fasten one’s hands with Sam Walton’s multipurpose totes.

“The Big Wheel” – This is the most dangerous of all methods, but very common. It’s utilized by those with motorized bikes and scooters. The rider puts his feet up near the handle bars – parallel to his hands – in order to protect his legs and feet from the water below. It puts the rider’s balance in a very precarious position. The risk of injury is quite high, but keeping one’s pants dry trumps safety.

“The Huckleberry” – The Huckleberry is the most common tactic and involves rolling one’s pant legs up to the knees (ala Huck Finn) and wearing flip flops or going barefoot. This strategy keeps the shoes dry (as they are kept in a backpack), but puts one’s bare legs and feet at the risk of a sudden “foot stop” that might be necessary or any random critters that might want to munch on the exposed flesh.

“The Rat’s Ass” – This is the second most utilized method and it’s when people take absolutely no precautions whatsoever to protect themselves from the elements. They ride to work as if it’s a perfectly sunny day and they don’t give a rat’s ass that it’s going to rain 6 inches today.

A Little Eye Candy

During our flight home from Dallas, Annie and Juliet were seated in the two seats closest to the window and Scott was seated across the aisle from them next to a 50-something American man. After some brief cordial chit-chat after boarding, Scott and his seat-mate, each began reading their respective magazines as we taxied down the runway. Scott noticed that his new friend was reading Time and thought to himself “great, maybe later in the flight, I can borrow his magazine if I need something to read.”

After a few minutes, Scott was deep into his Sports Weekly and noticed out of the corner of his eye, something that strongly resembled a female breast. Initially, he figured it was just a picture in Time. A minute later, however, when looking to the left side of his magazine, Scott realized that it was not in fact a Time magazine picture, but rather, a hard-core porno magazine slipped inside the middle of Time.

After the man fell asleep 30 minutes later, Scott figured that would be the end of viewing. However, at least twice later in the flight, the magazine made its way out again – apparently when it was “Time” for “little pick me up.” Needless, to say, Scott decided not to ask to borrow his pal’s reading material.

Returning Home

We had a great week in Dallas as we celebrated the National Day holiday, and we survived the 18 hour journey home on Friday/Saturday.

Juliet had a great trip with one minor fiasco. A little over half way through the flight, after waking up from a 6 hour nap, she received a full cup of Sprite with her snack. Unfortunately, before getting a chance to savor the lemon-lime goodness, she spilled the entire glass all over herself and Annie.

Fortunately, Annie had inexplicably put Thursday’s dirty laundry in our carry-on luggage so she and Juliet both had a set of clothes to change into – albeit slightly dirty from the day before. We did not, however, have an extra pair of underwear for Juliet. We’re sure those seated around us got quite a chuckle out of us trying to convince our resisting five-year-old of the benefits of going “commando” versus wearing soaking wet princess panties.

The New MasterCard Ad

In about 10 hours we will show up at the American Airlines ticket counter to check in for our trip home to Shanghai. We will then embark on an 18 hour trip that has all the makings of a new MasterCard ad.

Oversize Baggage Charge = $50

Piece of Pepperoni Pizza at Sbarro = $7

Cinnamon Roll from Cinnabon because Juliet changed her mind about the Pizza = $8

Jack and Coke on the plane to wash down the Nyquil = $5

Playing “Old Maid” for 14 hours with your five year old who refuses to sleep despite getting up at 4am that morning = Priceless

Fallen Off the Face of the Earth

Where are the Richardson’s? Sorry for the absence in the posts. We are actually on vacation for the Chinese National Day Holiday (we get the first week of the October off of school and work – Annie also gets the week off from shopping and scrap booking).

What exotic location did we choose to spend the week at? ….. Dallas, TX.

You might ask why we would choose to come home after only three months with all these great Asian destinations in our backyard. There were four reasons:

1. Eat Mexican Food
2. See Family and Friends
3. Get Juliet checked out by a Urologist
4. Eat Mexican Food

We have had a good week and have been able to accomplish all four of our goals. Juliet was tested and it was determined she has what is know as kidney reflux – we don’t yet know the treatment, but it does look like surgery is unlikely, which is a relief. Our visit with family and friends has been great and now we’re looking forward to an extended trip at Christmas. Mexican food is still the best cuisine in our minds despite our acquired affinity for Chinese food – who would have thought Pig Stomach could taste so good?

One thing we have realized this week is how much we do enjoy living in China. Despite the pollution, the language barrier, the smell, and the inability to purchase Rotel, we have taken to our new life over there and are looking forward to continuing our adventures next week.

I’m a Pepper, You’re a Pepper

We have said before the concept of a “case” of coke or water is pretty much non-existent here in China. Typically if you want 24 cans of Coke, you take 24 cans of Coke off of the shelf and let them roll around precariously in your shopping cart.

Well today, Scott was at the import grocery store and noticed full cases of Dr. Pepper. This is the first time in our 3 months of living here we have found Dr. Pepper. We like Dr. Pepper, but our best friends here in China are Dr. Pepper junkies. Thus, Scott decided to purchase 5 full cases of the unique tasting soda.

After spending 6.90 yuan per can (about $0.90 each), he headed for the door. Now, this is not your typical grocery store. It is best described as being inside a shopping mall. So it is usually illegal to remove the shopping carts from the store. However, after several botched Mandarin phrases and a lot of hand waving, Scott was able to convince the clerks to allow him to transport the cargo with the cart.

After maneuvering past throngs of gawkers en route to the parking lot, Scott came upon Mr. Chen gabbing with several other drivers. After one of the drivers pointed at me, Mr. Chen immediately turned around. Usually Mr. Chen is not surprised with what we purchase. However, today when he turned around, he was taken aback by the mountain of soda. With a very surprised look on his face and an immediate chuckle, he spouted something in Mandarin that sounded a lot like “What the f___” before loading up the car and heading home.

Blogging – Catch the Fever

Our level of technological savvy can best be compared to that of a chimpanzee – basically we have none. Four months ago, we didn’t even know what a blog was – now we have caught blogging fever. Whether writing our own or catching up on other friends’ sites, we are hooked.

When we first started writing this blog, we really had no idea how the phenomena of blogging gets passed on from person to person. We expected this would be a good way to keep family and friends abreast of our China adventures. We had no clue that people we have never met would find fun in our trials and joys.

From the Roswell High School Class of 1966 to our friends and friends of friends in a quiet town in Idaho, to the First Miniature Guild of Ft. Worth, an office in Seattle, previous colleagues in Germany, “A Few Good Men” and their wives from Masawa, Japan, etc., it’s been great to get feedback from everyone.

It is also quite interesting to see the number of people who “stumble” onto our blog. We really do wonder what the people in Qatar, Barbados, Kuwait, etc. think of our escapades – “These naive Americans, of course you ate Duck Tongue, it’s a fantastic source of protein!”

Accessories

When Scott went to purchase the bicycles for he and Annie, he showed the sales person which two he wanted to buy. The clerk immediately asked what accessories he wanted added to them. Not knowing what standard equipment came along with a bike, he asked the clerk what accessories he recommended.

Clerk: “Well, on this bike here (Annie’s bike) you may want to add a basket and a lock.”
Scott: “Perfect – now what about this other one? (referring to Scott’s mountain bike)
Clerk: “You’re certainly going to need a lock and I recommend a kickstand.”
Scott: “It doesn’t come with a kickstand?”
Clerk: “No, that’s an upgrade.”

We are by no means bicycle experts, but a kickstand seems like an important component to the overall operability of a bicycle. It’s certainly more important than the bell - which is standard on all bicycles. Who in the world needs a bell on a mountain bike? Scott was not thrilled with his bell, and to add insult to injury, when he and Juliet were out on a ride last weekend, she turned to him and said, “Hey dad, let’s ring our bells together.” There is really nothing that can make a 30 year-old man feel more like a wiener than riding down the street while repeatedly ringing his bicycle bell.

Bicycle Owners

Over the weekend, we decided to purchase bicycles. Juliet already had one, but neither Scott nor Anne had been on a bicycle since the 80s. We decided that “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” Or in this case, since all of the 1.2 billion Chinese own bicycles, we thought we should probably do the same (basically peer pressure got to us).

Before purchasing the 2 wheeled vehicles, we had an extensive conversation. Juliet walked into the room during this conversation, and after hearing Scott declare he really wanted to get a bike, she stated matter-of-factly, “I don’t really think that’s your thing AT ALL.”

There is nothing like a little dose of the cold hard truth from your five year-old to get you off your duff and get some exercise. So we are now all bike owners. Scott, however, is the only person in all of China to refuse to get a basket put on the front of his. He won’t admit that it’s the “cool thing to do” here – swearing those large metal baskets are only for old ladies and the wicked witch of the west.

Mysterious Pile

The Pile above showed up several days ago on the street that leads into our compound. This is not the first time a random pile of something has shown up around our neighborhood, but this is the first time it's stayed for more than three days.

What is it you might ask? Is it dirt? Is it concrete? Is it rubble from a nearby construction site? Today, the curiosity was too much for Scott so he set out on his bike to get up close and personal with "The Pile".

Upon arriving on the scene, he pulled out his camera and snapped this photo. Just then, a pair of locals rode by on their bikes and perplexingly eyed him. Not to be embarrassed or denied the chance to determine what the substance was, he got off the bike and walked over to the pile. He picked up a stick and poked it to see if it was hard. As the stick quickly absorbed into the soft, gooey substance, Scott realized he still had no idea what it was. As he disappointingly turned to ride home, he saw the two passers-by had now stopped and were turning around and pointing at him. Despite his lack of Mandarin proficiency he's pretty sure they said, "That poor American fool is now checking to see if the pile is dead or alive. What, you schmuck, haven't you ever seen a haphazardly placed pile of crap in the middle of the road before?"

Pics from the Hospital

Here are some pictures of our stay at the local hospital a few weeks ago.

Juliet - at maximum beat-down and "plugged-in" to her IV

Juliet's Bed - She called it her cage (Yes that's a mosquito net up there)

The Twin Bed - We called it "The Love Nest"

The Air Conditioner - "1955 called, they'd like their cooling unit back"

The Window Shades - Awesome Perm, Dude!

Newspaper Headlines

There is just something a little bit different about the newspaper headlines here in China. Here are some of our favorites from the last week or so:

“Arrest over lover killed by hammer” – about a man who failed to marry his lover and instead bludgeoned her to death in the hope of marrying her in the afterlife

“”Sea lion” boy back to normal” – about a boy with deformed hands and feet who recently had surgery

“Mums-to-be suck when they sit down to eat” – about how expectant mothers have a poor diet

“Nude, foreign and sinking not swimming” – about a naked, drunk ex-pat saved from a local creek

“Money and mistresses don’t mix, say report” – about how 90% of officials convicted of corruption had a mistress – or several

“Men want women who look good, says study” – about a recent study that concluded men often choose women for their looks as opposed to personality

“Things start jumping around “magic boy” – about how appliances and other household items randomly jump in the air and levitate when this “magic boy” is in the room

A Career in Procurement?

Today we went to the market to try to find Scott a new computer bag and some shirts. There are several markets here in Shanghai that sell handbags, clothes, accessories, etc. It is a good place to get some name-brand or name-brand-like items at great prices. However, the only way to get great prices is to negotiate the price way down from the ridiculously high price originally quoted.

After several hours of bargaining and getting some really good deals, we were walking towards the exit when Annie spied a purse she wanted to check out. After thoroughly inspecting it, she asked the clerk “how much?” As the woman went to retrieve her calculator, Juliet leaned back against a suitcase, crossed her arms, and stuck out her belly. The woman had barely turned the calculator to us to show us her price quote, when Juliet belted out “NO” in an almost offended tone – as if to say, “Are you trying to cheat me here lady?” Needless to say – in the end it was the cheapest purse Annie has purchased in Shanghai.

Tribute to George

Today we said goodbye to one of our two cats – George Brett Richardson succumbed to a battle with pancreatitous. After two months of vet visits and wondering why George wouldn’t eat, he went under the knife for exploratory surgery today. Unfortunately the diagnosis was very bleak as George’s pancreas and liver were in bad shape. To say thank you to George, we decided to take a few lines of our blog to remember our 8 years with him.

We got George Brett and his brother, Nolan Ryan, a few weeks into our marriage over eight years ago. They were both kittens at the time and sold to us from the SPCA during a “two fur one” special. We were skeptical at the time of their kinship as Nolan was black and white and George was dishwater blond, but nonetheless we adopted them both gladly. Our first memory of George at the SPCA was having Nolan step on his head to try to draw our attention to the cage they shared. In the end, it was Nolan’s salesmanship and George's lovable gullibleness that sold us on the pair.

George was never a very bright kitty, but he was EXTREMELY friendly and always exuded a likeability that was unmatched among the feline community. Some of our fondest memories of George include:

• Laughing hysterically for the first 4 years of our marriage because he thought his name was Nolan. It wasn’t until we’d moved out of an apartment for two years that he discovered his name was indeed George.
• Despite his low IQ, George had innate sense to pick out the one guest in our home that was “not a cat person” or was allergic to cats. He was bound and determined to become that person’s best friend even if it took the duration of their stay.
• George was probably best known for his very loud purr. The best comparison is really that of a low-pitched Weed Eater. When we were on the phone, people would often ask what the loud grumbling noise was.
• George also possessed a strong affinity for the female breast (he got that from his “father”). He would pad Annie’s breast for hours as he purred contently.
  

In the end, we had eight great years and many memories with George and we bid him a fond farewell!

A Couple Hospital Quick Hits

As Annie was walking into the hospital where her gynecologist office is, she passed two hospital employees wheeling out a gurney. After closer inspection, she realized the person on the gurney was not a living person, but rather a corpse wrapped in a sheet. We are by no means experts on hospital protocol, but is the front entrance of a hospital really the best place to be transporting human remains?

Annie also witnessed a bust today outside the children’s hospital – “The Critter Man’s” (see a previous post) operation was shut down by authorities. In addition, his competitor down the street – “The Rodent Maven” was also put out of business. Apparently, it was determined disease-infested varmints were not the best items to be peddling outside a children’s hospital.

Cultural Differences

One of the significant cultural differences we’ve noticed here in China is the sharp contrast to how one handles everyday bodily functions. It is not right or wrong - it's just different. Here are some examples:

Spitting – It is very common to see spitting here in China and the clearing of one’s throat typically proceeds the spit. You really have to be on your toes however, because you do not want to cross paths with the flying wad of mucus as it makes it descent.

Lip Smacking (or Chewing One’s Cud) – We don’t know if this has something to do with getting the cigarette taste out of the mouth but the lip smacking sound is as prevalent as bells at Christmas time.

Nose Picking – At least three times a day you see someone in the car next to you “digging for gold.”

Belching – A good, deep belch from the heart will often garner a thumbs-up from a random passer-by.

Flatulence (or Farting) – Not as common as some of the other items on this list, but you do hear the occasional toot and based on the smell in some elevators, the “silent but deadly” variety is also alive and well here.

Public Urination – This will get you thrown in the slammer in the U.S., but here when you gotta go, you gotta go. Public urination is also not restricted to men – just because you have to squat a bit and there’s no TP nearby doesn’t mean you can’t go too.

The Hospital

The care Juliet received from the doctors and nurses at the children’s hospital was wonderful. They spoke great English and helped make a very tough situation as good as possible. Unfortunately, it is a VERY old hospital and the facilities themselves were not exactly what we’re used to.

Upon arriving at the hospital, we mistakenly stumbled into the local section where we waded through hundreds and hundreds of very very sick children and their parents. It was the most eye-opening experience we’ve had since we’ve been here. Children lined the halls with IV bags hanging from the walls or being held by their parents. Some children were naked. Several children were wandering aimlessly holding their urine samples (with no lid). It was a quick dose of reality.

We made it back to the foreigner’s ward and were shown to her room. What we saw was much better than the local facility we had just seen, but it was still very substandard compared to the U.S. There were two beds in the room. One was a bed that could double as a crib – Juliet referred to it as her cage. There was also a twin bed for Annie and Scott to sleep in. The walls were very dirty with writing and lots of brown marks. The bathroom was extremely old – there was a place with no ceiling tiles in order to let the hot water tank (mounted in the ceiling) vent. In addition, there was a very slow leak at the base of the toilet that led to Juliet getting at least 3 pairs of pajamas wet and prompting a change of clothes.

Some of the highlights of our stay:

• We were able to play about 25 games of “Uno.”
• The first afternoon, Annie went home to pick up clothes, toys, etc. While Scott was with Juliet, her fever spiked again. He called the nurse in and she asked if he had brought any medicine with him. He said no, so she went and retrieved some children’s Motrin. However, after this, we just administered all her fever-reducing medicine ourselves that we brought from home – we can honestly say, we never expected to “self medicate” in a hospital.
• Outside the hospital grounds we were exposed to many different vendors hawking their wares. Most of these vendors were selling very cheap toys or balloons for people to reward their children after being good in the sea of humanity inside. One guy was selling a wide array of small animals. “The Critter Man” as we called him had a good assortment of turtles, bunnies, chicks, baby ducks, gerbils, hamsters, and squirrels. Annie even swears she saw a baby raccoon in his inventory.
• The hospital serves Chinese food for its patrons, but they did not bring us any because they didn’t think we’d want it. Thus, at 6 pm the first night, Scott was left scrounging for some dinner for his family. He was able to rustle up the number for Papa John’s and we had pizza delivered to our hospital room door – both Wednesday and Thursday night.
• Annie and Scott were able to get up close and personal sleeping together in a twin bed – nothing helps light the fire of a marriage like sharing a bed meant for an 8 year old.

Our Last Few Days

We apologize for the recent hiatus in our posting, but Juliet woke up Wednesday morning with a 105.1 (40.6 Celsius for our Asian and European readers) degree fever. We took her immediately to the doctor who diagnosed her with a very severe urinary tract infection. The only treatment to cure the infection was IV antibiotics for at least 3-7 days. So we then headed to the Foreigner’s Ward at the local children’s hospital to begin treatment.

Her fever subsided by Friday and they took an ultrasound to look at her kidneys. After spending two nights in the hospital, we left on Friday evening and came home as her infection had gotten much better. However, since it is still prevalent in her body we are returning every morning for two bags of IV fluids and antibiotics (carrying with us, an empty Evian bottle filled with that morning’s “first urine of the day.”) We go on Monday for additional tests to determine the exact location and extent of the infection in her kidneys, and whether or not she will need additional tests, procedures, etc.

Thank you to everyone for their thoughts and prayers this week. Even thousands of miles away, we have been overwhelmed with the concern and love we’ve received from our friends and family.

Inexpensive Services

One of the really nice things about living here is that some things are very inexpensive – including some personal services – such as haircuts, massages, etc. For example, yesterday, Scott got a haircut, a 10 minute head and neck massage, and 20 minute shoulder massage for equivalent of $8 total. Annie regularly gets a foot or Chinese body massage and it’s similarly inexpensive.

The only issue with massages is there are a number of places around town that don’t necessarily appear to be on the “up and up” if you know what we mean. Many of the ads in the paper (there is a full page of massage advertisements) seem to confirm our suspicions. A few of the more questionable names of these establishments, pulled out of Saturday’s paper, include:

“Pink Fling”
“Sweet Evita”
“Cloud 9”
“A Go Go”
“Happy Angel”
“Eye Candy”
And the ever-so subtle “Paradise 69”

Odd Items in Large Quantities

Life is certainly different here in China – here are a few of the odder things we see a lot.

Multiple People on Mopeds – This is one of the more unsafe things we see around town. It is not uncommon to see two people riding on a small moped, which you might see in the U.S. as well. However, it is also not uncommon to see a family of four cruising down the highway on the same size moped. We have seen this with 3 different configurations. One – mom on the back while dad drives with two toddler to 4 year olds standing between dad’s legs. Two – mom on the back holding one child while dad drives with another child standing between dad’s legs. Three – mom on the back holding two children while dad drives. Whichever way you cut it, a VW Santana looks better and better by the minute.

Styrofoam - One of the really strange things we’ve noticed here in China is the shear abundance of Styrofoam. Every day you see at least one or two guys on a bicycle with a MOUNTAIN of Styrofoam stacked and adeptly roped on the back. The height on said Styrofoam pile typically ranges between 8 and 12 feet above the bike, and the width is between 5 and 8 feet. He takes up the ENTIRE bicycle lane and he must keep a keen eye out for low hanging tree branches.

Fires – This is a more recent development as we’ve see two fires in the last week. The first was a fire in a building under construction near Scott’s office. This building will be the tallest (or second tallest) building in the world when completed. Since the majority of the building is glassed in already (except for the very top), it resembled the tallest chimney in the world as all the smoke was billowing out the top even though the fire started on the 30th floor. The second fire was a few days later when, on our way to school, Juliet shouted “FIRE” – we looked ahead and there was a semi-large flame occurring right on the side of the road – we passed and felt the intense heat inside the car as a pile of shrubbery was ablaze.

Mr. Chen Running – Mr. Chen runs a lot – he runs to help us with groceries. He runs to get the car started when he sees us coming. He works very hard for us and we are lucky to have him. However, the most recent running episode was a little scary. On Saturday, we were leaving to run errands. As we were walking outside, Mr. Chen was backing the car down the street (our street is narrow and only one car can fit down it – thus he often will back down to our house). When he got close to the house, he put it in park and hopped out quickly to open the door for Annie and Juliet. However, he didn’t put the car in park – instead he accidentally put it in drive. Thus we had a runaway car rolling down the street as Mr. Chen was running to catch it. Luckily he was able to jump into the driver seat and pull up the emergency break before running into anyone or anything.

She just can't say no

For those of you who know Annie well, you know she has a difficult time saying NO to volunteer opportunities. For example:

• In Texas, she accepted a position as the District Communications Officer for United Methodist Women even though it required a four-year term (Scott is convinced the only positions in the U.S. that require such a commitment are the President of the United States and UMW district officers.)
• About a year ago, the President of UMW at our church stepped down unexpectedly. Annie was serving as the VP at the time and wondered if they might ask her to take over. She swore for 30 minutes one night at dinner that she would not take the position if offered. Right at the end of the meal, the phone rang. Within 8 seconds of answering the phone, the words “I would love to” oozed from her mouth and Scott began to weep.

For the past few months, Annie has been adamant that she wasn’t going to take a leadership position here in China. She just wanted to “ease into things” and just be a "regular member" for a while. So this morning she had a PSO (PTA for those of you in America) meeting at the school. There was also a children’s ministry meeting at the church, but she wasn’t going to be able to attend. (Note: She had never been to a meeting at either the school or the church and only knows a handful of people at each place.) The following conversation occurred at dinner:

ANNIE: “Well I accomplished a life goal today.”
SCOTT: “Did you run a marathon.”
ANNIE: “No, that’s lunacy … you are looking at the Head Room Mother for Juliet’s class.”
SCOTT: “I bet there was a lot of competition for that one.”
ANNIE: “I was the only volunteer.”

At that moment the whole table paused to admire Mae as she hoisted a whole lemon pepper chicken breast with her chopsticks. The conversation continued:

ANNIE: “I forgot to tell you that I was also chosen as the Administrator for Preschool and Kindergarten Children’s Chapel at church.”
SCOTT: “I didn’t think you went to that meeting.”
ANNIE: “I didn’t, but my friend asked me if I would do it.”
SCOTT: “So your friend volunteered you at the meeting.”
ANNIE: “No, she didn’t go to the meeting either.”
SCOTT: “So let me get this straight. You were elected as the administrator for something at a meeting where no one knew who you were?”
ANNIE: “Yea – pretty much. I was a bit concerned when my friend told another lady that I had accepted the job and her response was “praise the Lord.”
SCOTT: “Yes, I would see that as a red flag myself.”

A Different Way to Make Your Point

There is certainly a different style for non-native English speakers to get their point across. For example, we recently received this month’s newsletter from our community. Apparently, they are having a problem with pet waste around the compound. If this were happening in the U.S., the point might be something like this:

“Just a reminder to the pet owners, you are responsible for your animal when they are in the common areas. This includes collecting pet waste and keeping your animal on a leash at all times. This will keep the area around the complex beautiful and safe for all patrons.”

By contrast, our reminder here in China was:

“In order to keep a good environment of the compound and safety of the other residents, please dispose of your pet’s poo immediately and make sure they’re lashed while you walking your pets for the purpose of the prevention of any unexpected situations.”

The lashed versus leashed is an obvious typo, but the reference to “poo” was curious. We must admit, we did expect to hear the word “poo” this year, but we figured it would come home in Juliet’s new “kindergarten vocabulary” not in the compound newsletter.

The Trials of Learning Mandarin

All of us are now beginning to learn Mandarin – which is extremely challenging to say the least. The crux of Mandarin is to learn the “tones.” Instead of having as large a vocabulary as languages such as English, Mandarin instead has one-fourth of the words. One word then can mean four (or sometimes five) different things depending on the “tone” you use when pronouncing the word. This can cause problems – particularly in the following cases:

• Buy and sell are the same word
• 4 and die are the same word. Instead of saying 14 the other day, Scott said “Die Person!”
• Mother and horse are the same word – thus instead of saying “I love you mom” it could come out “I love you horse”

The other complicating factor is that the words can take on different meaning when combined. For example:

• “Bao” means bag and “mian” means flour, but “mian bao” does not mean flour bag, but rather, bread
• Ma means horse and hu means tiger, but “ma ma hu hu” means so-so not horse horse tiger tiger.

All in all, we are slowly picking up some key words and phrases, but mostly we just nod along and say “Hao de” (which means OK) a lot even though we have actually no clue what people are saying to us.

Military Time

One of the nice aspects of things here is that numbers are typically shown in both numeral form and in Chinese characters. This is nice because you can always find your flight or train number, pricing, time of day, etc. The only issue with the time is typically it is not shown in a.m. or p.m., but rather in military time. For Scott, this is not much of an issue, because, despite not having ever served his country, he did work for Safelite Auto Glass and Windshield Repair for a summer – and they used military time in their archaic computer system. For Annie, this has been a particularly difficult adjustment – prompting at least one call to Scott at work to find out what 15:00 meant.

We were quite puzzled though today at the pool when while reviewing the pool rules, we noticed the hours of operation: 13:00am – 19:00pm. Now, we are by no means military experts so we don’t know if we’re missing something here or what. It was our understanding that when using military time, one didn’t need am or pm because you aren’t repeating any of the times. Thus, if any of our veteran readers can shed some light on what time you think the pool actually opens, we’d welcome your comments. We’re pretty comfortable the pool closes at 7:00pm – however we’re a little perplexed as to what time it opens.

More School Info

Juliet is attending an international school here in Shanghai. It uses a U.S. curriculum with the addition of at least 30 minutes of Mandarin everyday. So far she is doing pretty well - except for the extreme exhaustion everyday. For those of you who know us well, you know that in Juliet's five years of life, she has rarely gone to sleep on the south side of 10:00pm. Even last year when she was in preschool, she typically didn't go to sleep until around 9:00pm or so. Last Thursday however, after two grueling days of kindergarten, she was asleep in bed at 6:50pm.

Here are some pics from the first day of school (including one with Mr. Chen (our driver) and one with Mae (our housekeeper)).

First Day of School

Well, it’s a little hard for us to believe, but we have a kindergartner. Today was the first day of school and Juliet had a great day. We were wondering if she might be the child who cries on the first day, but no, she did great and was ready for us to leave her alone. (By the way, if you were “the crier” on the first day of kindergarten, all 30 kids in your class remember your name – and your face – to this day – even if you haven’t seen them in 25 years). All seemed to go well for Juliet on her first day, except for the hot lunch:

Annie: “So, were Goldfish OK for a snack?”
Juliet: “Yes, that was fine”
Annie: “Do I need to send a drink with your snack?”
Juliet: “Yes…..and you need to send a sack lunch because the food in that place …… not good”

Now, we will admit, we found it odd they were rolling out with entree choices Oyster Beef and Pork Filet with Mustard Sauce on the first day, but surely it was edible? We just don’t know why they didn’t go with Chicken Nuggets, Cheese Pizza, Hot Dog on a Bun, etc – heck even a Crispito would have been a better choice. The problem with sack lunches here is that sandwich bread is not so easy to come by, and it has a shelf life of approximately 17 hours before transforming into a fantastic science project titled “Mold in China – Colors Never Seen Before by the Naked Eye.”

Despite the lunch issues, Juliet deemed the day a success and is looking forward to tomorrow.

Delicacies

This week Scott traveled on business so he ate all Chinese food that was chosen for him in big Chinese-style dinners. Typically these dinners and lunches are served “family-style” with the dishes placed on a “lazy susan” in the middle of a round table. The food gets moved around the table for at least an hour and the dishes just keep coming and coming. It’s not uncommon to have 12-20 items served. All in all, the food was excellent, but Scott did get to try several items that were a bit “different.”

Beef Stomach – this was served cold and looked like thin onion rings. However it had a strong garlic flavor and a funny texture. It was not his favorite.

Pig's Ear – this one looked like garlic gloves. It was tough to chew and tasteless. Scott did not have a second nibble on this one.

Pig Stomach – this was served in a soup. It was similar to a cross between egg drop soup and corn chowder. Scott was very surprised as this one was very good.

Chicken Feet – this was Scott’s first rodeo with chicken feet. He thought the flavor was fine, but there was something disconcerting about his mouth right between the toes trying to pluck out the meat with his teeth.

Names

As many of you know, the Chinese often pick a “Western” name for work purposes because the given names are difficult for Westerners to pronounce. These names are typically close (in some way) to the given Chinese name but not always. Some of the common Western names we’ve heard include Jenny, Jason, Bobby, and Maria. Some of the not-so-common Western names include Rocky, Lotus, Ivy, Irene, Leon, Tulip, and our personal favorite – Kitty.

Another confusing name conundrum for us is the family name is said first. Instead of Annie Richardson, it would be Richardson Annie. So you might be asking, did we get to pick a Chinese name? The answer is no, but we were kind of given one. Scott has business cards that are in English on one side and Mandarin characters on the other. He asked a co-worker what the characters said his name was – keeping in mind that in Chinese r’s are pronounced like l’s and vice versa. The guy looked at the card and kind of chuckled. He said, your name is “Lee Chow Sun – I will call you Mr. Lee.”

Scott ran into a slight problem this week, however, when checking into his hotel for a conference. Instead of booking his room under his English name, they booked it under his Chinese name. So he was informed when he gave them his passport (which of course does not reference the family name Lee anywhere) they didn’t have a room for him. However, after 30 minutes of scurrying around, the problem was solved and Mr. Lee was able to check into his room.

Update

It’s been a while since we posted an update on some of things going on in our lives in China. So here’s a quick rundown:

We got both our air and sea shipments last week. It was like Christmas, Hanukah, Easter, and Graduation all rolled into one. The joy was immense. Juliet was so thrilled to get her toys. Annie was elated to get her things to turn the house into a home. Scott had never been so happy to see a case of Right Guard in his whole life. We also received the digital camera charger so we’ll start posting pictures soon.

The maid (Mae) has been with us now for 3 weeks – working about 30-35 hours a week. We didn’t know how we would like having someone else in our house so much and worried that we wouldn’t like having a full time employee. That reluctancy was dashed in about 12 minutes – Mae has truly changed our lives. The house is always spotless, as she does a great job cleaning. Having all our clothes neatly folded and pressed is glorious (though Annie had a “Sleeping with the Enemy” moment the first time she opened her underwear drawer and each pair of panties was meticulously folded).

Mr. Chen (our driver) is rapidly learning English. So much so that we’re worried the world’s biggest backseat driver (Juliet) is going to make him quit. “Why are we going this way?” “Why is this taking so long?” “Does he know where he’s going?” There’s nothing like a five year old who’s lived here for a month questioning a man who’s been a driver in Shanghai for 20 years.

He’s Baaaaaack!

Our good buddy, the electrician/plumber was back yesterday morning for the first time in about three weeks. His return was necessitated by a slight electrical issue we were having. For 36 hours, the lights in the entire upstairs were not working. (While showering by moonlight was interesting, we were tired of mistakenly using Oil of Olay Daily Face Moisturizer as Shampoo.) After about 4 minutes, the electrician/plumber had fixed the problem.....and uncovered 3 more.

So what we thought might be a four minute job turned into a six hour ordeal. At one point while he was waiting on a part, Scott went out to the garage to offer him a cup of coffee. He responded that he would just rather sleep. However, a few minutes later, he sauntered into the house, and proceeded to start up some small talk with Scott. (He must be convinced that we’re on the “Learn Mandarin in 48 hours Program” because he has been to our house five times and every time we speak no Mandarin, but he continues to talk to us as if we know everything he’s saying.) Finally, after listening to about two minutes of his banter, Scott responded with “Sweet, dude” and left the room.

Unfortunately our talented handyman friend doesn’t have a clue how to shut doors either. After about the 30th time closing the front or garage door, Scott found himself franticly searching the translation book for the phrase “we don’t live in a barn,” but was unsuccessful.

Cell Phones Providing a Little Taste of Yesteryear

Personalized cell phone ring tones are popular in the U.S. but not something you hear everyday. Occasionally you’ll hear a catchy jingle that cost someone $15.95 per month, but by and large people go with the boring, mundane, pre-programmed tones. In China, that is not the case. We feel like the ONLY people in a country of 1+ billion that do not have a personalized ring tone. The interesting part is that 9 times out of 10 it is a popular American song from 10-20 years ago. It’s really hard not to giggle like school girls when you’re walking down a sweltering street with neon Chinese symbols all around and you hear Aaron Neville’s “Everybody Plays the Fool” on a cell phone ring.

You thought Huey Lewis was extinct? Think again – HUGE in ring tone circles here. Nothing like riding up 24 floors on the elevator and getting “Power of Love” stuck in your head for three days (consequently the Back to the Future movies are on every weekend here – if Christopher Lloyd and Michael J. Fox made Back to the Future 4 – Return to the Qin Dynasty, it would break box office records).

Though Huey Lewis and Aaron Neville took us on a trip down memory lane, catching “We are the World” the other day on a ring tone in Carrefour was classic. Annie had not heard that song since getting a love tape in the fifth grade. The thought of Willie Nelson and Stevie Wonder singing within two minutes of each other, belting out those classic lyrics, brings tears to our eyes. We couldn’t remember, but didn’t Big Bird have a few lines in that song also? Or was that ALF?

The most surprising ring tone – particularly considering that we reside in a communist nation is the Star Spangled Banner – and we’ve heard it at least three times already. If we lived in America, we can understand it, but we’re not so sure it’s the smartest move here. And to think, just a few weeks ago, Scott was leery of wearing his American Flag swim trunks to the pool.

The other cell phone quirk here is that when you call someone, you usually do not hear a dial sound as it’s ringing. Instead, you hear music – like being on hold in the U.S. This music takes many different forms. Classical music (Bach, Beethoven, etc) is popular as is music that sounds very similar to what they play in the U.S. when you enter the “Orient” section of the zoo or Six Flags. However, the most popular choices are Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston, which is good because it’s recognizable and everyone knows it. There is a bad side though – it’s a tad bit embarrassing when someone answers the phone with you humming or singing. It’s REALLY embarrassing when someone catches you in full-on karaoke mode “And I……I will always Loooooooove youuuuuuuuu.”

Telemarketing

One nice thing about living in China is that we don’t have to worry about constantly being pestered by telemarketers. Not being able to speak the language when called on our local Chinese number usually results in “I only speak English” followed by a click. If the pesky caller keeps at it then a handoff to the maid results in the end of the call.

If someone calls us on our 817 number from the U.S. then they usually aren’t too thrilled about servicing customers in Asia, as Annie found out today when the Dallas Morning News called:

DMN: “Good evening ma’am – I hope you had a great day.”
Annie: “Thanks, but actually, my day’s just getting started.”
DMN (as Annie tries to stop her to no avail): “Oh – got the night shift huh? Well I am calling because you’ve been selected to receive a free two week trial of the Dallas Morning News…all I need to do is get your address from you.”
Annie: “Do you deliver to Shanghai?”
DMN: “Where exactly is that?”
Annie: “Well, it’s east of Tyler.”
DMN: “We do have a pretty wide delivery area.”
Annie: “It’s in China.”
DMN: “Thank you and have a great day.”

Things Scott has Blown Up

Electricity here is 220 volts versus 110 in the U.S. - meaning that a power converter is needed on some appliances. It also means that Scott – who would never be confused with Captain Electricity has had some challenges in adapting to the new power scheme. Some examples of his electrical prowess are as follows:

The Computer – This is probably his highest level of his ineptitude thus far. After having incorrectly read the voltage requirements on our desktop computer, he plugged it directly into the surge protector without using a converter. The power supply in the computer immediately emitted a “cherry bomb”-like sound and smoked violently. Needless to say, Thomas (our landlord’s son-in-law who also happens to have a background in computer engineering) is coming over this week to replace the decimated part.

The Phone – We have a phone we use to call the U.S. that gives us very good monthly rates. Unfortunately we have to buy the phone in the U.S. We had a power outage two weeks ago that caused the base on the phone to fry because Scott had not used a good enough surge protector (a word to the wise – when we move back to the U.S., do not invite this man over to help install a ceiling fan or any device that requires “voltage”).

The Toaster Oven/Coffee Pot Combo – This was actually a locally made appliance and it lasted for a total of 8 minutes. We do not have any idea what Scott did to make this thing spark and smoke, but have deduced that it might be similar to powers possessed by the mythical god Midas. Everything Midas touched turned to gold – everything Scott seems to plug-in pops loudly and begins to smoke. The only other possible explanation is that a higher being was sending a message not to cross-pollinate two appliances that have absolutely no business being put together.

Language

One of the more challenging aspects for us here in Shanghai is that many people do not speak English – especially people from older generations. English is now taught in many schools so the number of young people that understand it is growing. We actually have a better chance of being understood when ordering a hamburger than we do by a police officer. Thus, in case of emergency, we have Micky D’s on speed dial but not “911”.

Another complicating factor is that despite Mandarin being the national language of China, many different dialects are spoken. For example, in Shanghai, those who are from here speak Shanghainese. Our impression, when we arrived, was this was similar to Mandarin with just a few variations. We thought it was like how, in Texas, we say “ya’ll” but in New York, they would say “you’s guys”. Unfortunately, we quickly learned this was not the case. Scott talked to his Mandarin teacher (he thinks her name is Ruth but he’s not exactly sure) this week about Shanghainese:

SCOTT: “Shanghainese is pretty much the same as Mandarin, correct?”
RUTH: “Well no, not really.”
SCOTT: “But the characters and “words” are the same aren’t they – just different pronunciations and sayings?”
RUTH: (who is not good at sugar-coating): “No it’s really a totally different language...but many people might understand basic Mandarin.”
SCOTT: “So what you’re telling me is that I am in the process of learning a language that many people in this city don’t speak?”
RUTH (who is from Inner Mongolia): “That may be accurate.”

The other language issue we have hits a little closer to home. No matter how hard we try, we cannot convince Juliet that people here are speaking Mandarin (or something like it) and not Spanish. We walked through Carrefour a few weeks ago and Juliet spied a Dora the Explorer DVD. The only thing that distinguished it as Dora was her picture. Everything else was in Chinese characters. Juliet asked, “Hey dad, don’t you think we need Dora in Spanish?” Unfortunately this had come just a few days after a long discussion we had with her after she asked, “Does everyone here speak Spanish?” The problem is being from Texas we’re just naturally so ingrained with SASL (Spanish as a Second Language). In fact, both of us have caught ourselves trying to be polite to someone and instead of saying “Oh, you don’t speak English?” trying “No habla ingles?” instead. This usually results in the person turning to a nearby co-worker or friend and saying something very loudly in Mandarin at which point everyone within 10 feet bursts out laughing. We can only deduce they have just said “this American moron didn’t get the memo that the Spaniards stopped in Mexico and didn’t actually make it to the Far East.”

Good and Bad

So now that we’ve been here almost a month, we’ve learned we have to take the bad with the good and vice versa…

THE BAD: There are no Mexican restaurants here.
THE GOOD: They sell Rice a Roni “Mexican Rice” at the grocery store

THE GOOD: You can get DVDs very inexpensively
THE BAD: Your movie has Chinese subtitles and in order to find a good DVD you must rummage through at least 300 action, horror, or action + horror DVDs. If you loved Ghost Rider, then you’d be in hog heaven.

THE GOOD: Kitty Litter here rocks – it’s some combination of birdseed and scooping American cat litter, but it works great – no mess, no odor, no cat-poop-problem.
THE BAD: Cat food is a problem. George and Nolan refuse to eat dry cat food here. They love the canned food, but it’s got either pieces of fish head or whole shrimp in it, and it smells like cat poop from the USA.

THE BAD: There is no bubble gum in Shanghai…at all. It’s either Doublemint, or some flavor called Blueberry Mint. Even the “impulse section” of the grocery store is completely void of bubble gum.
THE GOOD: If you’re standing in line at Wal-Mart and the romantic mood hits you, the “impulse section” is LOADED with every size, shape, color, and brand of condom. It’s a far cry from the US where they keep them under lock and key…“Excuse me Target team members, I need a Customer Service Rep to go unlock the Prophylactic Cage for the heavy-set gentlemen in the green shirt.”

In Search of a Princess Bike

We apologize for, yet again, another story from a shopping excursion, but we must share our latest experience. Annie and Juliet picked Scott up from work tonight and we headed to Thumb Plaza – our favorite area for eating, shopping, etc. They have a good American diner, a great Italian place, and a Papa John's, not to mention a 20 foot tall, silver-plated, modern art sculpture of a man with two thumbs up. We went for dinner, but also to procure a new bicycle for Juliet, as we did not bring one from Texas.

After having some great Italian food, we headed to Carrefour (French Wal-Mart) for what we thought would be a five minute trip (we don’t really like going there because despite being able to purchase a 12 pack of chopsticks for about $0.08, you must deal with a strange odor that conjures images of a combination of b.o. and Tuna.) But alas, they did not have the Disney Princess bike we had been eyeing for three weeks. So we made our way back out to Mr. Chen (procuring along the way all seven seasons of The West Wing, the first season of Jericho and Ratatouille all for less than $6 bucks) and had him drive us to the other Carrefour about 10 minutes away. This Carrefour is actually worse than the first because they apparently won’t open the doors unless they can get at least 10,000 sweaty shoppers into the store at once. Unfortunately, we struck out here as well and had to have Mr. C take us back across town to Wal-Mart (passing Thumb Plaza on the way.)

Now this was our first family trip back to Wal-Mart since our second day in Shanghai – and it didn’t disappoint. We were able to find just the bicycle we were looking for – in fact it was an even better model than we had seen at Carrefour. This bike contained not only a basket on the front and a bell, but also a baby seat on the back for Juliet’s “childs”. We were all filled with glee – Juliet because she had an “amazing” bike, Annie because her child’s eyes were filled with happiness and Scott because there wasn’t another discount retailer within 60 minutes of the house.

There was just one small problem that we hadn’t really thought about. As we mentioned before, our car is the same used for taxi cabs here – a small Volkswagen that would fit in the “economy” category in the U.S. So after waiting in line for 20 minutes, Mr. Chen began trying to load the bike into the trunk. We were sitting in the backseat (he refuses to let us help him load anything) watching him struggle. We worried how we would get the bike home because it was obviously too big for the VW. Little did we know that Mr. Chen (The Chinese MacGyver) had a plan. We saw him unload a sack of items we had purchased into the trunk. He then rolled up the Wal-Mart sack and tied down the trunk hatch with the most inventive “Boy Scout knot” you’ve ever seen. Bewildered, Annie turned to Scott and matter-of-factly stated “our driver just jerry-rigged our trunk with not a rope, not a bungee cord…but a Wal-Mart sack.”

So there we were…a sophisticated American couple with our five year old darling…clunking down the road in our taxi cab with the famous yellow “rollback man” flapping in the breeze.

Day at the Theater

Before we go into our day at the theater, we need to go through a very important change in the blog. From this point forward, we will not refer to Anne as Anne anymore. Instead, we will always type her name as Annie because that is how EVERYONE in China pronounces her name. At first, it was very annoying because Juliet would break into song “Tomorrow, Tomorrow, I love ya tomorrow,” but everyone has now come to accept that we left Anne in Dallas and in China, we have Annie.

So Saturday we headed off to the Shanghai Grand Theater for Mamma Mia – little did we know when we purchased the tickets we had chosen to attend a matinee on the hottest afternoon of the year. When we arrived at 1:00pm the temperature was approaching 100 degrees with every single drop of humidity in Asia concentrated in Shanghai. Of course there were no signs around, so we wondered aimlessly with the masses until finally finding the entrance…now sweating profusely.

The show itself was great – very good story and the ABBA music is mixed in very well. It was in English with Chinese subtitles on large screens to the side of the stage. One thing we learned in those two hours was that ABBA is HUGE in China. People dancing in the aisles and clapping wildly at times – it was a lot of fun. Another lesson we learned is that it is A-OK to BYOF&D (Bring Your Own Food & Drink) to the theater. We were the only people in the place who didn’t bring a bottle of water, soft drink, or yogurt milk with them and don’t even get me started on the tuna and ice cream (thankfully not together) that appeared after the intermission.

When we left the theater, the temperature had cooled off a bit. It is actually hotter here in the late morning and early afternoon, than later in the day. The reason (we hypothesize) is that by late afternoon, the smog has built up so much that it actually works kind of like sunscreen – blocking out some of the sun’s most harmful (and hottest) rays. So it’s really the lesser of two evils – we can either bake in the morning or stay cool in the afternoon…but feel like you’re hacking up a lung.

After leaving the theater we headed for a return engagement at the California Pizza Kitchen (no condiment pilfering this time – however the manager did remember us, which scared us a tad.) We ate quickly in order to make it to Annie’s 6:00pm doctor appointment where we learned that smoking in hospitals is still very much allowed here. In fact it brought back memories of “Thirsty Thursday” nights in college as we smelled like we had spent the last few hours in a smoke-filled bar (or bowling alley).

Welcome to the Neighborhood

Yesterday Anne and Juliet were in the midst of deep, refreshing, Friday afternoon nap, when they were stirred awake by the phone. The shaky voice on the other end said the Director of the Complex wanted to come down and welcome us to the neighborhood. Anne quickly shot up and readied herself for his arrival. Three minutes later, he rang the doorbell (which coincidentally plays “The Yellow Rose of Texas”) and presented Anne with a bouquet of flowers. The encounter went something like this:

Anne: “Thank you – pink roses – my favorite!”
Manager: “Oh what a happy coincidence. Where do you come from …America?”
Anne (like a true southerner): “Yes, we’re the Richardsons and we come from Texas in the USA. My husband’s name is Scott and I’m Anne.”
Manager: “Ohhhh – so your people come from Scotland?”
Anne: “Oh No. My husband’s name is Scott and my name is Anne.”
Manager (confused): “So you both come from Texas?”
Anne (not realizing some information is just too much information): “No I come from Texas and Scott comes from Kansas – we met in college.”
Manager: “What a romantic, happy story.”

A few minutes after he left, Anne curiously noticed several men hauling off large chunks of timber and leaves. After thinking to herself “Huh, that’s a bit odd,” she shrugged it off and attributed it to the construction going on next door. Three hours later, after Scott had arrived home from work, we noticed our landlord’s wife and Thomas milling around in our front yard. We went outside to find out what was going on. What we discovered was the trellis over our covered parking area next to the garage had been knocked down in several places and there was a big hole in the ground next to the driveway. Thomas said to us, “What, you guys didn’t know that about four hours ago, lightning struck the tree that used to be here?” Anne turned to Scott, shrugged and said, “No Clue.”